Slowly getting better each day

[itsjustkate]

Its been over 7 months since he dumped me and I still think about him daily BUT I am in a much better place. I am happy. I have everyting I wanted when we were together, I just dont have him. I miss him (in some ways) and wish we had never dated, just stayed friends. Im coming to terms with everything and accepting things and looking forward to the future when I am finally over him completely.

[CubbyBear]

Glad to hear it!!! What sort of things have you done to assist in getting over him?

[Qac]

Its been over 7 months since he dumped me and I still think about him daily BUT I am in a much better place. I am happy. I have everyting I wanted when we were together, I just dont have him. I miss him (in some ways) and wish we had never dated, just stayed friends. Im coming to terms with everything and accepting things and looking forward to the future when I am finally over him completely.

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soo nice to hear such words from you. i'm in 3rd Month of Breakup. My girl left me for really odd reason which actually means she didnt wanted to spend future with me.

 

I just want to say.. I'm in a worse situation. Her dreams haunt me everyday. Life seems miserable now.

 

For you, i would suggest to stay happy. I know you have everything you want. You should do whatever it takes to be happy. Its good that you are coming to terms to accept. I just hope one day i would do the same!

[CubbyBear]

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soo nice to hear such words from you. i'm in 3rd Month of Breakup. My girl left me for really odd reason which actually means she didnt wanted to spend future with me.

 

I just want to say.. I'm in a worse situation. Her dreams haunt me everyday. Life seems miserable now.

 

For you, i would suggest to stay happy. I know you have everything you want. You should do whatever it takes to be happy. Its good that you are coming to terms to accept. I just hope one day i would do the same!

 

Why did she leave you? I hear what you're saying about the dreams, brotha!!! In waking life I think about her all the time. While I'm sleeping, I dream about her. I cant escape!!!!!!

[itsjustkate]

To get over him, I have allowed myself the tears but didnt let myself wallow. When I have some time to myself I let myself cry and say all of the things I never got to say. Then I remind myself that I am not the only person in the world with a broken heart and many of them have gotten over it, therefore so can I. My ex also did MANY things over the years that I at times left him for but went back when he called. This time its easier because he's not calling and begging me to listen to him. I do wish I had listened to my gut way back when and had kept my distance instead of agreeing to listen to the excuses for his behavior. I let him make me feel not good enough. The relationship got to the point where I was jumping through hoops ALL the time with the promise that If I just did ths or that I would get what I needed in return. It never ever came. I realized and accepted that it never was going to come. He was never goign to be able to love me the way I needed and deserved to be loved. My breakup is still difficult emotionally but every other area of my life has gotten SO much better. It really has. All of the other things I had wanted, I now have. Its just so crazy to meI was so willing to settle for such unhappiness for so long. And my son (who is 9 and not his son) told me he likes life without him so much more as well. I think part of that is he saw me hurting and heartbroken for a long time. He likes his happy mom better. And we now live in a new place, closer to my job and we have a dog. Both of those things would not have been possible with my ex. The other night as my son was drifting off to sleep he mumbled, "I love my life." I dont think he meant for me to hear but I did. I asked why and he said, "Because I love our home and our dog and YOU." So, yes, I get sad. He was my best friend. I DO miss him in some ways but I dont miss the relationship with him. I miss the man he promised he was (but wasnt). I miss what I wanted him to be. I miss my best friend. But I dont miss how the relationship made me feel most of the time. I dont like the person I became in that relationship. I am VERY happy with who I am and where my life is right now and that makes it slightly easier. (Yes, I still cry and ache sometimes but it HAS been getting better.)

[itsjustkate]

I blocked him from FB, I do NOT internet stalk him (the drive to not do it is SO hard) and I dont reach out or try to run into him. I have let myself get used to life without him.

[elsenyor]

Its been over 7 months since he dumped me and I still think about him daily BUT I am in a much better place. I am happy. I have everyting I wanted when we were together, I just dont have him. I miss him (in some ways) and wish we had never dated, just stayed friends. Im coming to terms with everything and accepting things and looking forward to the future when I am finally over him completely.

 

hey looks like we're more or less on the same timeline (tomorrow I hit 8 months), looks like you're doing great! i know what you mean about still thinking about them / missing them but time will help, it's proven to me that it does, and so will a new SO when we're ready for it (when we're completely emotionally available and over the ex that is).

 

i wish i could have remained in contact with my ex or be friends, but i'd obviously have alternative motives than friendship. it'd be based mostly on my experience that all my female friends end up having crushes on me, it's the only reason I'd like to be her friend lol (we didn't break up because of a loss of attraction that's for sure), but knowing that i wouldn't be able to be myself which is a shame wouldn't help my cause.... so i have to be away... far away.... until forever maybe XD.

 

It's probably for the best, even though this wasn't a motive for breakup I'm turning 23, she's going on 28, she might want a kid soon and I won't be ready for it until I'm 28 (even though she said she'd wait, you can't really say with these things)...

 

I blocked him from FB, I do NOT internet stalk him (the drive to not do it is SO hard) and I dont reach out or try to run into him. I have let myself get used to life without him.

 

I know what you mean! Blocking and deleting my account didn't do the trick because I could undo the things, so I decided to give up all choice in the matter that I had... gave my fb account to a friend email and pw and had him change both. I have ZERO way of getting into my account lol, and while I was with her I helped her change her privacy settings so I can't see anything publicly

 

Also she's been good about NC and so have I, worst and last thing I ever told her was "have a good one" in a condescending tone and last thing she said that was hurtful was "BYE!"... in hindsight that isn't all too bad lol. I've erased her # since and kept it in a safe place, because I'd be tempted to look at whatsapp pictures and ALMOST text (never did) when feeling down. Those urges don't even come up anymore.

[itsjustkate]

It does sounds like we are on a similar time line, elsenyor. We exchanged very hurtful words when we broke up so that has made contacting him less desirable. We had done the off and on thing for years. If he had contacted me I would have gone back. If I am being completely truthful, I would probably be very vulnerable to him, still. I think I will always love him and always have to avoid him.