LadyJD Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Going to keep it super short and sweet, I've gone on 3 dates with this guy. He's very sweet and funny and we make each other laugh a lot. I like him and he seems to like me, he texts me between dates and all that. We had our 3rd date last Sunday, he took me to a nice restaurant and we had a 2 hour dinner followed by 1 hour of walking around the city. I thought he would kiss me, at least a peck on the cheek or something, when we said goodbye, but he didn't. I thought ok, maybe he doesn't like me. Except he has texted and called me this week asking me out for a 4th date during the week (we didn't go out this weekend because I was out of town visiting my cousins). Is he not that into me or is he just super, SUPER slow-moving? I figured if he didn't like me he wouldn't ask me out for the 4th time, but then again I figured if he did like me he'd try a kiss. Link to comment
Kendahke Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Any reason why you didn't kiss him? Link to comment
NIN2000 Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 Maybe he is shy. Have you tried to kiss him? You have both gone out to nice dinners and shared a lot of laughs but is he romantic? Link to comment
LadyJD Posted August 25, 2013 Author Share Posted August 25, 2013 Any reason why you didn't kiss him? I know this is maybe silly but I kind of like to let the guy take that initiative. Link to comment
LadyJD Posted August 25, 2013 Author Share Posted August 25, 2013 Maybe he is shy. Have you tried to kiss him? You have both gone out to nice dinners and shared a lot of laughs but is he romantic? You know, he might be a little shy, he is a bit on the nerdy side and he is very polite and gentlemanly. He finds little ways to touch my arm or back or something when we're walking around but that's about it. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 I would give it two more dates and then be a little more forward. Link to comment
LadyJD Posted August 25, 2013 Author Share Posted August 25, 2013 I would give it two more dates and then be a little more forward. That's what I was thinking. Are there really guys so shy that they will keep taking a girl out on dates but not make any physical move? Should I be worried he doesn't like me? Link to comment
Kendahke Posted August 25, 2013 Share Posted August 25, 2013 That's what I was thinking. Are there really guys so shy that they will keep taking a girl out on dates but not make any physical move? Should I be worried he doesn't like me? Not until after you ask him and he's answered "No". He may be thinking you don't want that from him... has your demeanor been encouraging to him in that respect? Link to comment
LadyJD Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 Not until after you ask him and he's answered "No". He may be thinking you don't want that from him... has your demeanor been encouraging to him in that respect? I would like to think it has, when he says something funny and I laugh I'll touch his arm or something, stand real close to him when we walk. All the little hard to describe mannerisms where I think I'm putting out that kiss-me vibe. Maybe I can try a little harder. I also initiate texts and all that during the week so I would imagine that he knows I'm interested in him. I wouldn't be willing to go on 4 dates with him if I didn't like him, I should hope that would be obvious enough Link to comment
happpybear Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 Just kiss him. Every guy I have had a relationship with I have had to initiate first kiss and first sex because they were shy. I'm shy too, but i wanted to kiss them, and four dates is a long time to go without knowing if there is physical chemistry. Link to comment
John John Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 I have a third date coming up soon too, still no kiss. But I think this girl is shy, she hadn't dated in like 2 years because her last bf was, well, horrible. We also haven't really had a "proper chance" for a kiss (even though I just go for it whenever, I don't care about the perfect moment). But if I still don't get a kiss on this third date, I'm not sure how I'll feel about it. Most girls I've dated that have either become regular FWB or a gf I've kissed on the first date. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 That's what I was thinking. Are there really guys so shy that they will keep taking a girl out on dates but not make any physical move? Should I be worried he doesn't like me? I would give it two more dates- I think it's either that he's shy or getting involved with someone else so he's treating this more platonically. Link to comment
LadyJD Posted August 26, 2013 Author Share Posted August 26, 2013 I have a third date coming up soon too, still no kiss. But I think this girl is shy, she hadn't dated in like 2 years because her last bf was, well, horrible. We also haven't really had a "proper chance" for a kiss (even though I just go for it whenever, I don't care about the perfect moment). But if I still don't get a kiss on this third date, I'm not sure how I'll feel about it. Most girls I've dated that have either become regular FWB or a gf I've kissed on the first date. You have to go for it MCJD! What if she is like me thinking, why hasn't this guy kissed me yet? Link to comment
The_Seeker Posted August 26, 2013 Share Posted August 26, 2013 You have to go for it MCJD! What if she is like me thinking, why hasn't this guy kissed me yet? Because he's trying to get to know you better probably? Why such a rush for a kiss? I never understood that about people. Link to comment
LadyJD Posted September 1, 2013 Author Share Posted September 1, 2013 Because he's trying to get to know you better probably? Why such a rush for a kiss? I never understood that about people. I think most people would agree that a kiss by 3-4 dates is pretty standard. If you're going out once a week, that's like a month of seeing someone and you don't know if there is a "spark" until they kiss you. Seeker - when do you think a guy should go in for a case? Link to comment
LoveSoDeep Posted September 1, 2013 Share Posted September 1, 2013 I think you need to give him more pointers. If he's shy and this is his MO then he's probably used to being friend zoned. You need to make sure he knows he's not in your friends zone. When you take a walk take his arm then his hand. when you hug him make sure you don't give him the option of putting his arms anywhere but your waist and pause a second maybe say something to him so he's close enough to kiss you. Also make sure there's a part of your date that is kind of secluded if he 's shy he isn't going to kiss you out in the middle of a public space. Try this on date 4 and see if he gets the hint. Link to comment
Batya33 Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 I think most people would agree that a kiss by 3-4 dates is pretty standard. If you're going out once a week, that's like a month of seeing someone and you don't know if there is a "spark" until they kiss you. Seeker - when do you think a guy should go in for a case? I think you can know if the spark is there if you desire to kiss someone -no need to have an actual kiss. I agree that after 4-5 dates he should try to kiss you. I had to make that happen once with a reallly shy guy - I actually had to suggest that our next date be watching a movie at his place. He was really enthusiastic about it but it was a Friday after he'd had a looongg and difficult week at work. He fell asleep during the movie, then at 1am when I moved to get up and leave, he woke up with a start, saw me there, and went in for the kill like a flipped on light switch. Too funny. Link to comment
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