Is this where i really stand with my ex whom i still love

[kantore]

So I spoke to my ex last night and decided to lay it on the table. She told me that she does not see me as a potential partner anymore, and does not think that she would let herself fall in love with me ever again. She told me that when I broke up with her, it hurt her so bad that she forced herself to close the door. Now she only sees me as a friend and nothing more.

 

How can someone tell himself or herself how they feel? I mean is this really possible? I always thought that true feelings come out and that we really have no control over them. Am I wrong? Can girls really tell themselves what they are feeling and ignore what they really want? I mean, I understand that she would be cautious (as would I), but how can she say that there can be nothing there, when she has not even seen me in a year or more. Tell me if I am wrong, but can you know how you feel when you have had the luxury of not seeing the person for that long. After all, the saying "out of sight out of mind" does have some validity.

 

When we got off the phone, she did admit to me that this is just how she feels right now, and that her feelings "may" change. I really do not think that it is likely, but it still bothers me that someone would tell himself or herself how they feel about a situation. It is not like she fell out of love with me, she forced herself to move on. I would love to see if she felt the same way if I went up to see her. I think it would be very different.

 

[Jose]

Who know's if girls can or not. Girls are very mysterious! Hopefully everything turns out ok for you two.

[toolgirl150]

for better or for worse - she has moved on. She has come to a place in her life where she believes she is better off without you, independent of her personal feelings.

 

Plus there's the trust. You burned her and she doesn't trust you anymore. Sometimes that doesn't come back as easily as you like.

 

It seems like you know this already - but you will just have to accept that and move on too. Don't be too hard on her. She's looking out for herself. She doesn't want to go through that pain again.