sex? should it be the man who iniates?

[sasha12]

In most relationship the guy initiates the sex. But if it is reversed where the girl is the one that iniates it how does that make a guy feel? I mean is it exciting to you or do you kinda lose respect for her?

[Switch187]

I think it's exciting, and a bit more sexy when the girl takes the confidence to initate sex. My g/f made the first move when we first had sex with each other 2 years ago, and I never lost any respect or looked at her differently because of it. It was a real big turn on for me, since she made it known that she really wanted this, and wasn't going to just sit back and wait for me to make the first move. So to your question, yes it's exciting (for me) and no I didn't lose any respect for her. It made me feel good to since I made a girl "crave" for me so bad that she took the first step and initiated sex.

[sasha12]

I heard that it is exciting to a guy if the girl is the one to iniate and that it makes him feel loved and appreciated. I also heard that guys don't always want to be the one to ask for sex because they feel that they might get turned down or something. I think more girls should iniate sex it's good for the guy's ego and it's fun for the girl because your the one making all the moves instead of the guy.

[GettingOverIt]

I think it's great for the girl to initiate. Yeah, sometimes, we guys like to be the one to start things up, but when she starts it first - oh man! It is especially a turn on if the guy isn't expecting it... I mean like if you're watching TV or just kinda hanging out, then she starts it.... It is a confidence booster, but it also lets the guy know that she finds him sexually attractive....

[Scout]

Do you mean initiate it for the first time? Because if so, the two times I had to initiate it, turned out they both had problems getting it up, and that's why they weren't initiating it! (Both said "i really have to get to know someone first" - um, i guess that's less embarrassing than saying "i'm impotent".)

 

So now, I would be wary if I encountered this again.

 

But in general, throughout the relationship, I absolutely think the woman SHOULD initiate it sometime, or the guy is going to start to wonder if she's equally attracted to him. And he might start thinking he always has to ask for it, which he will start to resent, and I wouldn't blame him.

[sasha12]

no, I'm talking about iniating sex when you have been in a relationship with the guy. In my case that was kinda hard for me because I'm pretty modest . But then when I'm thinking about sex I wonder if I should be the one to iniate it or not because I don't really have alot of confidence to do something like that. But on the other hand alot of girls will complain that there not getting sex from there S/O and I'm just wondering if sometimes it should be the girl that iniates it.

[tea]

I initiate it a lot. I think it's fun and if I initiate it it's a way of practicing and learning... ^^:

[Meow18]

For the first time, my boyfriend initiated it. I initiated it every once in awhile, but I think my boyfriend mostly does. He hasn't lost respect for me. In fact, he says he likes when I do.

[Switch187]

no, I'm talking about iniating sex when you have been in a relationship with the guy. In my case that was kinda hard for me because I'm pretty modest . But then when I'm thinking about sex I wonder if I should be the one to iniate it or not because I don't really have alot of confidence to do something like that. But on the other hand alot of girls will complain that there not getting sex from there S/O and I'm just wondering if sometimes it should be the girl that iniates it.

 

Well yes then, you should initiate sex a few times, especially if you don't want your man thinking that he always has to ask for it. My girl and me are both equally attracted to each other, and each of us can take the first step to initate things. Sometimes she will just pop on my lap while I'm typing, and then my clothes are off. Sometimes I'll give her a massage, then her clothes are off. It's really easy to initiate sex if youre in a relationship with someone, and the "surprise" effect is something that most guys (and girls) like.

[VictorWard]

But in general, throughout the relationship, I absolutely think the woman SHOULD initiate it sometime, or the guy is going to start to wonder if she's equally attracted to him. And he might start thinking he always has to ask for it, which he will start to resent, and I wouldn't blame him.

This sounds like my relationship. I've been living together with my girlfriend since July, and I can't remember the last time she initiated sex. Come to think of it, I don't think she has ever initiated it.

Like Scout mentioned, the guy (me) will start to wonder (has actually been wondering for quite a while) if she is attracted to him (me) anymore.

[JonnyG]

Do you mean initiate it for the first time? Because if so, the two times I had to initiate it, turned out they both had problems getting it up, and that's why they weren't initiating it! (Both said "i really have to get to know someone first" - um, i guess that's less embarrassing than saying "i'm impotent".)

 

So now, I would be wary if I encountered this again.

 

But in general, throughout the relationship, I absolutely think the woman SHOULD initiate it sometime, or the guy is going to start to wonder if she's equally attracted to him. And he might start thinking he always has to ask for it, which he will start to resent, and I wouldn't blame him.

 

Dam right, well said. Its a turn on when a woman initiates it because it shows that she really wants you and isn't having sex once again because you initiated it and she doesn't want to let u down.

[swordman]

It is great if you two can take turn to initiate. My partner love it when I start first. So do I.

[PAdreamer]

My boyfriend likes it when I'm the initiator. It shows him that I am comfortable sharing our relationship equally. It takes a lot of pressure off of him.

[sasha12]

PAdreamer, I love your posts you have so much confidence in your relationship! I wish I had that kind of confidence just to go up to my guy and get what I want from him. lol

[PAdreamer]

The confidence usually doesn't come until you've survived the months of literally going insane! LOL! I laugh now, but I promise you, it happens and it's going to be the biggest challenge in an LDR... Making it through those months without giving up. But it's doable. I'm face to face with my one year anniversary, and all but three weeks of it has been carried out online. It can work!

[VirginiaW]

My SO and I are 50-50 when it comes to initiating sex and I know for a fact that he finds it very exciting when I do the initiating.

[June4life]

I think guys think its hott when a girl initiates!