OVERREACTING

[lillady898]

I overreacted on my boyfriend who's away at college, again. Everything got so perfect, yet I always ruin it and give him doubts.

 

Here is how I have been ruining things after everything got so perfect for the past 2 weeks.

 

First, he tells me to call him at 2 am. I fall asleep and sleep through the alarm I set to wake me up just in case that happened. Now, he thinks I just forgot and this is another one of my excuses. (I admit... I do have that terrible habit of making excuse. I am trying to break it, though).

 

Another day, he told me to get on instant messanger at a certain time (3 am). I feel asleep and slept through the alarm again. Again, he thinks that is another excuse for forgetting.

 

Okay, and then yesterday I overreacted. I called him a few times throughout the day. He was busy so couldn't answer. Yesterday was a busy day for me as well, so when he tried calling me back I couldn't answer either. So, I finally get a hold of him at night while I'm driving and try to have a conversation with him. He is doing something else and is only slightly listening to me, but is listening nevertheless.

 

I freak out because he's not listening and say, "Fine. Why don't you just call me when you actually want to talk to me." Expecting him to say that he does want to talk, he just says alright, and we hang up. I call him back, freaking out that he doesn't ever want to talk. He says, "I've tried calling you all day!" We get in an argument and I hang up on him.

 

I call him at 2 am and he says he's too tired to talk. I get angry and yell at him, hanging up on him again. (Another bad habit when I'm angry).

 

Ok, now today I try calling him but he was studying. So he couldn't answer. I finally get a hold of him and try to have a nice conversation. But, I flip out when he says he has to go study so quickly, after we've only talked for less than 5 minutes the past 2 days. I say "F* it" and hang up on him yet again.

 

I call him back later after I'm done doing what I'm doing, and we get in an awful argument after I ask him if he still loves me or not. Yet, anotehr problem. I am so upset about stuff lately for some reason and I can't help but overreacting. I feel bad, but when I tried apologizing, he said, "I don't mean to sound rude, but I really have to study. Don't call me anymore when I say I have to study." That got me upset, but what made it worse was this.

 

He said if I can't handle that, then we'll just have to break up. I hate those words so much.

 

THEN, he said one of his friends told him that this is why he'll never have a girlfriend during college. Takes up too much time. That scares me that he'd even bring that up.

 

I don't know how I ruin things so easily. I just have been overreacting. He's calling me tonight.

 

Has anyone ever overreacted about things as bad as I do?

What should I have done differently?

How can I make things better and STOP overreacting?

 

Thanks! I feel like a psycho girlfriend right now. I annoy myself sometimes.

[lady00]

deleted.

[annie24]

Well, first of all, is he overseas at college? Is that why you have to call at 2 AM or 3 AM? Why can't he call you at a time that you're not sleeping? I don't think you're overreacting at all. He sounds like a jerk. He wants you to call, but then gets angry if you interrupt his studying? It's not like you're a mind-reader and just know when he's doing homework! I'd stop calling him and let him call me and see how things go. Good luck!

[Cloud802]

First of all, you are overreacting a bit, and trust me, you'r not psycho girlfriend. If he can't make time for you even in college then he's not worth it. Even if you are flipping out he should talk to you and try to reassure you, which he ISN'T doing. Try not to flip out and talk to him, and have a serious conversation, say that you really need to talk to him for the sake of the relationship, if he says he's studying or comes up with some other lame excuse then just dump him, he's only hurting you if that's the case.

[sisterlynch]

I am not sure that I would blame you for over reacting. It is rude of him to tell you that he is doing something else when you finally get a chance to talk. This sounds like a very high pressure situation for you to be in, it is depressing and can cause a lot of anxiety to be under pressure for too long. Find things that you can do for yourself while he is away. Make relevent choices.

[SweetGemini]

nobody deserves to be treated that way, if my fiance did that to me, (we are in a LDR by the way, oh and ill be moving near him soon! ) sorry , anyhowz if he treated me like that, i would have broken up with him... We see each other once every one month or two... and we call each other up, EVERY single night, for us communication is very important... when he is very busy he would tell me in a very nice way and will reassure me he would call me very shortly, and he always does... im the same, if i am going to go out for the night, i will call him before i go and let him know where i am going and what time i will call him back... communication and trust is a must in a relationship, if they dont exist then a relationship does not exist...

 

dont call him again, wait and see when he'll remember to call you, and when/if he does, dont yell and hang up on him, but talk to him nicely and ask him what he wants from you... im sure you will get your answer... be ready to let him go... i know its hard, but you deserve so much better!

 

im sure you will do what is right!