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Introduced through mutual friends - need some impartial advice, please!!


miss_sunshine86

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Hello everyone -

 

I haven't posted on this forum before (I originally joined this forum when going through a bad on and off again breakup), but I am back in the dating world after my last break up in April, so here I am!

 

My situation is, I was introduced to a guy by a friend at his birthday party a few weeks ago. I really enjoyed speaking to this guy, and he was good looking, so our mutual friend, who told me he is a really great guy, passed his number to me and we started texting.

 

We went on our first date this saturday, which I have to admit was really fun. We had dinner, drinks and a short goodbye kiss.

 

But since then the problem is his texts have been ridiculously full on. Really long, really flirty, I am just really uncomfortable with this. But this does not match with how he was in person! Anyway, he has also booked concert tickets for us both to go to (without even waiting to see if I am available) for a show at the end of March, and we are now in January. An example of a full on text was one saying "Good night my sexy lady" (We have been on one date), and "What's your sur name, I can see it begins with H, is that H for Hot because you are insanely hot to me".

 

I have to repeat, I did have a great time with this guy on our date. To add to the situation, the mutual friends who introduced us are having their engagement party on Saturday, where we will both be! I am going to meet up with a girl-friend and enter the party with her. But, I am slightly worried how he will be at this party now.

 

It could be partly to do with me - I have never been with a guy who has been so openly keen on me, my ex disappeared and had major commitment issues. On the other hand, I do know this guy is being overly full on, so I really am driving myself crazy with this situation.

 

So do you think I -

 

1) Go with it, at least until after the party on Saturday as I really don't want to make the party awkward for my friend and I don't know how he will take a "rejection"

2) Tell him I am uncomfortable with flirty texting, its not really my thing, but say i still like him and want to get to know him, and depending on how he reacts to this either cut it off now or see how things go.

3) Cut it off entirely - not sure if I want to do this because I did have a good time with him and there is a good chance of awkwardness at the engagement party.

 

 

I really, really appreciate any advice, thank you!

 

 

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I would suggest 1 and 2. Go to the party with your girl friend. Don't respond to his ridiculous texts and hopefully he'll take a hint and knock it off. If he keeps it up, then I would return his text and tell him you're not comfortable with his flirtatious hyperbole. He might be the needy and clingy type, or maybe he read a book that turned him into Lounge Lizard Larry. In any case, I wouldn't worry that much about hurting his feelings, as his text behavior is clearly going to drive you away anyway. If you're honest and upfront, at least he may learn something.

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