Am i Intimidating, guys please help me out?

[xcountryprincess]

Often when i go out with my friends i meet pretty good looking guys. The thing is i think they are interested because we often make eye contact. What i just dont understand is why they dont come and talk to me or get my number. So many guys look but they hardly ever come and talk to me.

 

Could i be unintentionaly intimidating them or sending out the wrong signals.one more question. if it were u and u were looking at a girl why would u approch her and what would stop u from approaching her?

[DBL]

We don't want to make fools out of ourselves in public.

 

DBL

[Kitz]

Cause you women are crazy, we don't want to make fools out of ourselves in public.

 

DBL

 

We're not crazy!!

 

xcountryprincess, its because you're so beautiful they're all afraid to go over and talk to you because they think you've been hit on a million times today already and you'll turn them down.

 

Alright, so i'm a girl, yeah, and have no clue about what guys are thinking. But its nice to think that that's the reason why they never come over and talk. ;D

[DBL]

Thats a good reason Kitz.

 

I don't approach sometimes because I don't know if they are single.

 

DBL

[Mr Mister1]

Kitz and DBL are both right. A lot of us guys (definatly myself included) are, well, scared of approaching girls we find attractive, we fear they'll tell us to go die or call us a typical male pig or something. I'm sure you're a lovely person and would never do that but we wont know that until we get to know you and until then it's a mystery.

 

When I've been single and gone out to meet people, for a start I could never apprach a girl if she is with a group of friends, what if she tells me to go away? I'd not only feel embarrised by her but I'd have her whole gane around there to laugh at me. I could only ever go up to someone if they were on their own.

 

This is going to sound rather slack but perhaps you should try approach the guys if you think they're good looking. It may be that they do find you attractive but were too scared to go up to you, if so it'd be a dream come true for you to go up to them.

[corvidae]

A lot of women think that when a man finds a woman attractive he goes over and makes a move, so if a guy doesn't make a move then that's because he's not interested. But it's not as simple as that. Men can often be as scared of making the first move as a woman would be. We have the same worries about rejection and looking foolish. In terms of choice women often have it much easier than men, in that men present themselves to women and women choose to take it further or not. An attractive women pretty much has her pick of men. When you approach someone like that you are essentially putting yourself forward and saying they should pick you over everyone else. Men, like women, have self-doubt, and it can find this very hard. It doesn't necessarily mean a lack of confidence, just a lack of arrogance. My suggestion is to try to meet guys half-way. Don't expect them to put in all the effort. Don't play games either; if you like someone talk to them.

[JonnyG]

Couldn't of said it any better

[DBL]

If you woman all made it easier...like wink or wave at us, then i'm sure us guys will do our share and walk over and introduce ourselves.

[Mun]

I know how you feel and I remember asking somebody this. He told me that I wasn't intimidating, but my friends were. I had no idea!

 

He said that I should try going out alone for awhile or maybe separating from my friends for a bit when I'm out to give someone a chance to approach me.

 

This might be the same with you.. try it.

[sole]

If you woman all made it easier...like wink or wave at us, then i'm sure us guys will do our share and walk over and introduce ourselves.

 

WRONG! We may smile and even wave but the guys only smile back and say "Hi" but it stops there. I mean we do that and guys still don't make a move.

[DBL]

Ok maybe we need to be more aggressive...like pinch our butt.

 

In your post you said the guy says hi back, so that means it would be in your court. If you waved at me or winked...I would say hi. If you didn't say hi back, then I would just let it lie.

 

When I was younger...I would just walk up to you, I was an arrogant SOB. If you didn't like me, it was because you had issues. Don't when exactly I started becoming sensitive on rejection.

 

Another reason I guess I don't make the approach anymore is because when i would hang out with a group of girls. I would watch guys come to talk to them, after the guy left, they talk crap about him...I don't ever want to be that guy.

 

DBL

[asdf]

Ok maybe we need to be more aggressive...like pinch our butt.

 

In your post you said the guy says hi back, so that means it would be in your court. If you waved at me or winked...I would say hi. If you didn't say hi back, then I would just let it lie.

 

When I was younger...I would just walk up to you, I was an arrogant SOB. If you didn't like me, it was because you had issues. Don't when exactly I started becoming sensitive on rejection.

 

Another reason I guess I don't make the approach anymore is because when i would hang out with a group of girls. I would watch guys come to talk to them, after the guy left, they talk crap about him...I don't ever want to be that guy.

 

DBL

 

i disagree with the pinching butt thing. If a girl pinches my butt and I haven't even introduced myself, i would just think she's too sexually aggressive (i was gonna say ---, but that's censored)

 

personally, i think guys should just get over it and go up and ask a girl out. just do it right, and you'll have nothing to be ashamed of, people usually won't reject getting to know somebody new unless they're very shy or they're very snobbish.

[Caldus]

Well I'll be honest. I tend to never approach women who are attractive because in almost every case, they are either already taken or not interested.

[DBL]

The butt pinching was a joke.

 

DBL

[phantom_]

like the others said, if its a a group of women, forget it. no way, aint happening. the potential for humiliation is far too great.

 

however if she's alone, and theres no doubt she is indeed looking at me and not some other guy behind me or to my side, and i think i might have a shot (i dont know how one goes about determining that..but oh well), i might go over.

[Mr Mister1]

I know how you feel and I remember asking somebody this. He told me that I wasn't intimidating, but my friends were. I had no idea!

 

He said that I should try going out alone for awhile or maybe separating from my friends for a bit when I'm out to give someone a chance to approach me.

 

This might be the same with you.. try it.

 

That's a good point and another problem I had. When I've liked a girl often her friends would suss it out and give me the evil eye, (at least it felt like that's what they were doing).

 

I remember back in high school there was a girl I really liked and would go up and talk to her, sometimes when her friends were around and they would all look at me as if I didn't belong anywhere near her, it was really intimidating.

[drahcir]

i really don't think you are intimidating guys.....LOL...don't worry....i have responded the best i can to your questions!!!!

 

"Often when i go out with my friends i meet pretty good looking guys. The thing is i think they are interested because we often make eye contact.

---just because you make eye contact, it doesn't neccessarily mean he likes you. Maybe he is just being friendly

 

"What i just dont understand is why they dont come and talk to me or get my number. So many guys look but they hardly ever come and talk to me. "

----don't worry!!! They are probably just as nervous as you. They probably think, "she is too good for me.".......maybe they have low self esteem and are too shy to ask you. But in any case, there is nothing wrong with you.

 

"Could i be unintentionaly intimidating them or sending out the wrong signals."

---i doubt it

 

one more question. if it were u and u were looking at a girl why would u approch her and what would stop u from approaching her?":

---i would want to get to know her more first. No one wants to taken advantage of, so they want to get to know someone more before they ask them out. Maybe they are interested in you, maybe not, but either way it takes time to get to know someone like YOU|!!!!!!!!!!!