whats going on?

[prtoricanqueen]

well when i met him he was 19 i was 30 it was blissfull but now i know it was because i was working i had a great job i had my own place and i was helping him with everything gas money food money i was cooking for him i was flipping the bill for everything.

 

he never gave me a flower he never took me out and paid, and frankly now i kno i was his ticket to florida... i got used. well we moved here in march it was struggle from the minute we got to florida we were homeless for 2 weeks we couldnt find decent jobs we couldnt find a place it was a lot of stress and frustration and he told me he wanted his own space he wanted to be on his own..after i told him plenty of times to find his own place and not worry about me and my children that we would be ok...he didnt listen he insisted in finding us a place because we came here together and we should work thru this together.

 

Well we found place but neither of us had a good job i didnt have one he had 2 that together werent worth nuthin we were scared we needed to have something quick to be bale to keep the place well he landed a better job and i got a job at walmart i was excited just because it was a job and i was going to be bale to help my man out but guess hwat he told me? 'how much will you be making?' i told him and his response was oh that little?...i told him you know i can never make you happy at least is a job and it will help out so you wont feel overwhelmed with bills.

 

and funny because when he had a job at a fast food restaurant i supported him and told him honey be proud is a job. well we kinda started getting along a bit more but there was always this insecurity in the back of my mind that something was going to go wrong well he lost his job..luckily i had some unemployment i was owed from new york and it came at the right time thank god so i was able to pay rent electric phone car note car insurance he needed a part for his car so i ended up paying everything he had no job so i encouraged him to go to a few places luckily he found a job a much better job.

 

but one day he left his yahoo messenger on and some girl was iming him i confronted him and we had a huge argument he told me he was tired of being attached he wanted to be free he wanted to be alone he wanted to meet people he wanted to go out and flirt and dance without worrying about hurting anyones feelings he was tired of my insecurities...he told me to think about what i wanted to do and to let him know

 

that night i wanted to talk he didnt but i talked anyway and i told him what i had come up with since we are in a very bad situation financially we have no choice ut to live 2gether in the same house well he was fine with it i told him you have to do your own laundry your own cooking and you have to do you he was fine he just said he didnt want to be in a relationship he wanted to be alone free solo noone to answer to noone to come home 2.

 

I said my peace and what i thought was best it was 9 pm he never goes to bed b4 1 am and all of the sudden he turned and said im going to sleep i said is early he said he was tired and he told me you know i wish it never got to this point and i said i didnt either but things happen.. and i went to sleep i was in peace i said to myself is finally over is gonna be ok...well around 3 am i feel someone touching me he wanted tot alk i didnt i was sleepy he wanted to talk about us he wanted a chance he wanted another try but y would i agree to do that after i was told he didnt want me didnt want a relationship he even had asked me y would u wanna be in a relationship that the other person doesnt want you?....that hit me and i said to him it wont work he said u dont know until you try if it doesnt then we will move on u have to realize nuthin is forever he said.

 

well it was ok for 2 weeks then all of the sudden one night he walks into wal-mart and tells me someone took my coins right then and there that meant accusing me or my children...he told me if those coins dont come up when u get home and look for them you have to go is a wrap you have to leave i was so upset i had to leave work i couldnt stop crying...so that night he called and i told him i cant take it anymore is not working we have to be just friends roomates whatever u want to call it but yoy have to do you and i will do me and my kids because u accused us of taking ur coins when they were there all along it was the devil that made u blind.

 

he didnt come home the next day he works nights and he is usually home by 7:30 am and he never showed again that night he showed up at wal-mart to tell me i was right is better off if we end it because is too much damage and as much as he tried to work things out it just doesnt work so that night he had me on the phone all night talking and telling me y we had to remain in a no title relationship y change living arrangements when we still have to be in the same house in other words u can keep cooking doing my laundry and giving me sex but in the meantime i will look for something better...guys correct me if im wrong what does no title relationship mean???

 

well like 3 weeks ago we were watching a movie and he asked me if i was happy with us getting along and i told himm yes but not with the no title relationship he told me titles were made by man and the only title is marriage...that we can be 2 ppl happy getting along with out giving it a girlfriend boyfriend title, im still not happy but he didnt seem to care...he told me it doesnt feel like we are not together because emotionally and physically we are together but mentally we arent again what does this mean???

emotionally and physically we are together but not mentally..

 

well just this saturday we were watching a movie and his phone rang he didnt answer it i asked him y he said because he didnt feel llike talking i knew it was another female...so after the movie was done he ran in the bathroom, when he came out i asked him if he had slept with anyone else but me he got scred and asked me y but told me no i didnt tell him y i asked...but i said but you are talking and seeing someone else arent you he did tell me we are not together we shouldnt be having this convo and i didnt answer the phone because i dont feel comfortable talking to other females in front of you. i told him is the same thing if you run to the bathroom to talk to them he said i have female friends but i dont sleep with them...and i talk to someone yes because you and me are not getting along.

 

i also confronted him on some gay porno i found on the computer he told me it was a way to make money because women would not pay to see or talk to a fat black man and old gay men would and he was going to tell me but he was afraid of my reaction but he was going to surprise me with new furniture when he made nuff money entertaining gay old men..he told me i knew he was always looking for ways of making money i feel is so dirty...then i told him i was moving back home he was livid he asked when i made that decision he asked me what time how i was getting there who was i going to stay with..and he had ate some food at 9 pm by the time we were done talking he threw up everything he got sick to his stomach.

 

he told me he missed what we had but of course because i was taking care of everything of course he missed that i told him everything i felt i told him everything i did for him i told him how i felt used...then sunday i was so depressed and he was stillsick but he asked me "if i come up with some money and help you find a place would u stay in florida?" i told him no he told me you dont want to go you havent thought about that you havent thought about the consequences of moving back....i left it alone next day i was looking online for tickets and he told me you act like you are leaving tomorrow i told him time flies i have to act fast and he told me all the energy and money you are going to spend moving you can use to stay here and find a place y is he trying to find options for me to stay????? y when i dont sleep in the same bed he asks me y i am not in bed ????

 

i told him yesterday that once im gone there will be no contact none whatsoever no phone no emails nuthin is completely over i want to heal i wanna get my life back together and he got upset he asked me not even contact with my mom???....now y do i want to keep in contact with his mom y is he sonterested in keeping contact y? y ? is killing my im so confused is over when soeone breaks up is over no contact is best but he doesnt seem to agree...i told him the time i have left here i wanna be happy and in peace with him is no need to be arguing and hating each other he told me to let it go that i cant expect that we wont stay in contact and that we could be all sweet..y cant we be civilized until then what does not remaining in contact have to do with trying to get by these last couple of weeks??????....

 

there is my story more or less in a nut shell there r little details i didnt go into how my garbage would pile up in my garage and he wouldnt take to the sumpster because here you have to pay for garbagr pick up and the neighbors take the gharbage is a shame and how he wouldnt stop smoking after saying he was os many times like how he drinks everyday and he drinks hard liquor on weekends and everyhting that comes out his mouth is i want a drink....how all he wants to do is sleep all day he never wants to go shopping grocery shopping walking in the mall

 

i need feedback advise stories of something similar hope anything

 

thanks guys

 

[usied]

get as far away from that guy as you can! you and your kids do not need that .... ...do not know what is wrong with ppl these days ...but you def are better off without him!

[prtoricanqueen]

...well last night he showed up in the house well he walks in and out all the time...he came and he called me stupid at least 20 times he first got mad because he says i dont want to help him he wants me to leave my name on the electric bill after i leave.

 

i said no i am removing my name from that acct the reason he is mad is because once i disconnect the electric toremove my name he has to come up with 210 dollars to get it on his name...he accused me of not helping him after i spent 2 yrs helping him financially and doing everything for him....he said to me he thanked me already for that...

 

well the second reason he got upset is because i changed the password on my computer he called me stupid then he said i do stupid things well when he showed up last night supposedly to get his camera after he was gone for 5 hrs he came in the door and saw that i had taken my computer out of the room we once shared..i took everything my clothes my computer everything that belonged to me as soon as he waled in the door the 1st thing out his mouth was stupid he called me stupid he said i do stupid things and asked me y i took the computer out the room if i knew he uses the computer 2..i told him im leaving anyways i started taking things out and packing i told hium get a grip im leaving soon and he mocked me.

 

he then told me i had nuthin to offer not now not then and he tried so hard to make our relationship work but i never wanted to make changes in my life he told me i have a lot of changes to make and he is going to pray a lot for me because i need a lot of prayer because i dont do and never did sh@t for my family i told him not to worry i will change and i will put my family 1st because i neglected them for 2 long...he told me i always fail to see my faults but im quick to see his...he told me he could care less of what i do and he told me if he wanted to he had all the right to put me and my kids out in the street because he is head of household and his name is 1st on the list..

 

he kept just going on and on about what i didnt do to save the relationship and if i had done what he told me we would still be together...i found a place to go im moving the 15th of novemeber i pray to god and not because iwill be weak because i wont my bbaies deserve better but i pray he never finds me i dont want nuthin to do with him i really hope he stays away i am not telling him where im moving to...

 

today he came home while i was out seeing the home im moving to and he called me at least 5 times on my cell phone i didnt pick up i knew it was something stupid but after i made some phone calls and disconnected my electric and my cable i called him all he wanted was to ask me if i had seen a shirt he wanted to wear....then i told him i was moving the 16th and i already called the utilities and he had to do something b4 that day if he wanted his lights on he said he new and he would take care and i said good bye and hung up.....y did he feel the need to insult me and tell me i never had anything to offer after everything i did is he trying to put me down so he can feel good is he trying to get back at me for not leaving my name on the electric bill and for not letting him use the computer...y did he have to do all that instead of letting it go??....

[evy38]

I'm sorry, I don't mean to be harsh, but this man was always to young for you. He still seems like an emotional child, and you don't need another child to support, my friend. Cut him loose and let him stand on his own, once he's grown up he might somebody a good husband, but not now and not you. You go out there and find yourself a real MAN, who believes in the same things you believe in, an honest living, family and love.