How do I approach this girl!?!?!?!?!

[Boromir]

I've been working with this woman for over a year now.She just turned 26. She is actually a consultant who works with a different team, but we are in the same department. I'm 32.

 

The amazing thing is, we've really never had a conversation, yet we see each other every day.

 

When I first saw her, I was in awe by how hot she was, and I got a glance back from her. When I turned to look at her again, she looked back at me. You normally don't get a second look from a woman unless she likes what she sees.

 

Anyway, she's apparently shy and only talks to people that she is on a project with, or seems to know very well. Ironically, I am kind of the same way. I am very approachable and friendly to people that I have broken the ice with, but very stand-offish with people I don't really know. Well, hot girls that I am interested in I am definitely stand-offish with. People I don't care about? Easy. Women I dig? Much much harder.

 

The best part is that I casually mentioned to someone that I wanted to get to know her better, but figured a girl as beautiful as her would have a boyfriend. This guy came back to me half and hour later and over a single conversation with her, found out a bunch of stuff including that she had no man. I laughed, but it just went to show I don't have the balls to just walk over and talk to her like he did.

 

She did have a boyfriend for a short time, but I guess she is single now. I can't imagine what could have gone wrong because I would treat this girl like gold.

 

Anyway, when we pass in the halls, if I get a smile from her, it is at the last second as she is usually looking away or down at the ground. It isn't until someone talks to her does she actually keep her chin up and act normal. But since we don't talk. . .

 

I used to get the smile a lot, but recently it's stopped. I don't know why. A friend says that I come accross as a little arrogant or uninterested to people I don't know, so I may have accidently sent a message to her that I really wasn't interested in getting to know her. She may be a lot like me where I kind of need to be pushed to approach someone.

 

It is hard to just go up and introduce myself, because everyone I work with is around it I would just feel so stupid. I constantly talk to everyone I know because I am warm and friendly to everyone there, but since I don't get any kind of "I'm here" sign from her I don't try anything. She works hard, so most of the time I see her she has her nose in her project.

 

So I guess ladies. . . what do I do? How do I read this? She used to give me such beautiful little smiles, but now it just looks like she's avoiding eye contact. If what my friend says is right, maybe I've come accross as "whatever". I mean, she see's me talking to EVERYONE but her.

 

When we do make eye contact, it'll be in a situation where she'll round a corner where me and a few people are standing and she'll look right at me for a second (and usually only at me), and then look away before I have a chance to smile.

 

She's caught me looking at her, and she'll look at me right back. It's just so hard to read this girl.

 

What do you think?!?!?!

[geo_jane]

She used to give me such beautiful little smiles, but now it just looks like she's avoiding eye contact. If what my friend says is right, maybe I've come accross as "whatever". I mean, she see's me talking to EVERYONE but her

I think that's your answer. She used to get a "he likes me vibe" from you but now she doesn't so she just figures your not interested and is trying to avoid you.

 

I think your chances are good if you ask her to have lunch with you or a drink after work or something.

[Alien777]

I suppose you could always 'test the waters' by saying a simple 'hello' the next time you walk past her. Try to smile when you do this it will make you seem far more approachable. 0X

[ejacobson]

i agree. just try and say hi in halls the next time you see her

[Rigel]

wow.....that's so odd.....I'm in the same situation at work.

Only I'm the female. We haven't started up a real conversation since we've been working together.

 

Since you're both shy you're probably both avoiding the situation. It's stressful. I think the best thing to do is to take the initiative cause if ya wait for her, you may be waitint a while. Gather up your courage and give it a go