TopFive Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 It has been a week since my ex broke up with me and I cannot let go of the thought of her talking to or being with another guy. She has told me a few times that she didnt mind being by herself even though she hates being single. She's pretty much been in a relationship with someone her whole life and doesnt know how to be alone. She also always tells me that she's not pressed for guys. In our conversation the night of the breakup, i asked her was she talking to guys and she told me to be more specific, but i think she was just being a "B". Then she told me that she was tired because she came in at 5am that morning. That REALLY got me thinking. Even though it's over I still get bothered by the thought of her hooking up with someone else. Is this something I should be worrying about? Link to comment
csr14 Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 No, if you broke up you need to try not thinking about her. She could be doing a million other things than hanging out with a guy. You need to be worrying about yourself and just pretend she's off studying. Who cares what she's doing? If she is with another guy just think that he will be the next guy that gets his heart broken by her or vice versa - that will be the next guy who breaks her heart. If she can't be single, shes probably not very healthy in relationships and I doubt that anything will last very long for her. Link to comment
mixhot Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 Topfive.. its a killer isnt it mate, my ex is with my best mate, well ex best mate now and what goes through my mind is Fking mental. its probably the worst thought you can deal with but it happens and it will happen sooner or later,.. there is NOTHING you can do to take the thought away, the more you think of it the more the snowball will start rolling and the more you will want to contact her and get paranoid in whats going on... you dont want to go there at all,, what you gotta do is think of future plans, think of new things to do. every time you think of it do some push ups or go for a walk. my ex cant be single, when we 1st broke up she sed she wasnt ready for RS and shes on her second while she was keeping me as her back up " both rebounds and 1 my ex mate!..was togteher 3.5 years, like csr14 said "shes probably not very healthy in relationships" cut the cord now, start concentrating on healing, i wish i did this aloooooooooooooong time ago.. just keep on keeping on mate and be strong. Link to comment
secondchance67 Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 She is going to be with another guy...she will most likely be with several, before she settles down with "the one" she has been looking for....it is eventual for her, and dont lose sight of the fact that it is eventual for you as well. What she does....who she does it with....her motives...her reasons....all inconsequential to your healing now......you need to treat this like a death; her memory can remain, but there is no going back or resurrecting the past....you havfe to let it go, and the thoughts that plague you about her and her life along with it. Let her go live her life, a life she chose to pursue without you in it. Let her experience this new found freedom completely void of your prescence; let her feel the space left by you in her life...let her see the consequences of her actions without clouding her judgement or pushing her further away by contacting her. If, and i mean IF, she sees in you something that she didn't realize she had, cross that bridge if you ever come to it. You can worry, check her FB, text and check up on her....but it will only accomplish more pain and self inflicted torment when she reacts coldly and with indifference towards you, driving you further into sadness and heartache. You have been given a gift; it sounds like if you want to be worried about something, it might be why you were attracted to someone like her in the first place and why you allowed it to last as long as it did. If you want to tell her anything, tell her "thank you" for allowing to pursue other interests and do so with a person who will be more compatible and in sync with your needs and aspirations for the future. Link to comment
TopFive Posted July 13, 2012 Author Share Posted July 13, 2012 JesseMartin I'd really like for you to read my other posts. Link to comment
Sportster2005 Posted July 14, 2012 Share Posted July 14, 2012 It is something normal to worry and wonder about. What is counter productive is to ask her about it. Break all contact with her. Eventually she will be with someone else. Take steps to get over her, so when that happens you will have moved on and won't care. Link to comment
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