birthdays and NC

[PhoenixOnFire]

I had to start a new thread cuz now I've got a new question about what I should do. To sum up what happened with us:

 

-3 yr relationship ended 1 wk ago

-broke up because I won't move 5 hrs to be with him and he won't move here when he's done with school

-we still love each other very much

-I have not written this off as a loss and am doing some soul searching so I can recognize the right action that I should take

 

His birthday is today. And I'd already ordered him a present which will be coming in soon. Dooooooooo I send it to him or save it?? I can already hear many of you screaming NC NC NC NC NC!!!!! I don't care about hurting myself, but I don't want to ruin what fun he salvaged for his bday. Granted he wouldn't get it for several more days.

 

Realistically, beyond this getting over him blahblahblah, in 2 yrs, in 5 yrs, whatever happens, I don't want to look back and feel deep regret over ignoring him and I don't want him to look back and think I was a jerk for ignoring it. I can't control his feelings, or what he thinks, etc etc. But, I'd rather be a jerk for doing something than doing nothing.

[markie6]

I had a similar situation , her present arrived after BU , her birthday was a month later, I sent it to her , she threatened to return it etc etc. I told her if she didn't want it to stick it on ebay. It was a source of discomfort for quite a while.

 

If you can handle all possibilities , returning it , liking it and not saying thanks etc etc then send it. At least you won't have to worry about it again for 12 months, although now the Mayans have zoomed * * * * Clark aboard their spacecraft , maybe we all don't have to worry

 

 

lol at spell checker , swear word that is Richard , shortened

[RFB]

You've been broken up 1 whole week. A week is not enough time to even decide if you are broken up for real. You may well reconcile in another week or so. So send him the gift.It might not help but it won't hurt.

[PhoenixOnFire]

Thanks for the help!

[lonelyheart2]

Yep I say send it too, and depending on his reaction then you can think about whether it really is time to give up or not. Could still be a chance to salvage your relationship Good luck!

[PhoenixOnFire]

I'm so glad I found this site. I've never been one to post things in forums, just been a perpetual lurker. But this site inspired me to share my story so I could get help and because sharing is what helps those other lurkers out there! So thanks to all you guys here for being so awesome!

[markie6]

Yeah best reason for not being a lurker is to help others. Most of us read a load before we post our stories.