should I marry him?

[leeann]

How do I know if the man I live with is IT and should marry him ( he says he wants to get engaged by x-mas)? I love him very much and he loves me. While he has many of the qualities that I want, i.e. good values, hard working, caring, thoughtful, affectionate, I am full of insecurities, jealousy and doubts about him and us. Although he treats me well and is a great father to my son, I am confused because if he is IT, then why do I have these feelings that consume my days? How do I know if these emotions are my problem and baggage or if it is a warning sign that I am with the wrong man? I don't want to lose him but I am sick and tired of never feeling secure with him about my body and looks or doubting his love and commitment to me. He is an amazing man who many would say to hold on to tightly for he treats me like a Princess. So why am I confused?

[Shy_Guy]

Leeann,

 

We need to focus on one thing here, it's not him, the question is, what's going on with YOU? It seems as though trust and commitment are difficult issues for you. Has he done ANYTHING to make you suspect he's being anything than uttlerly devoted to you and your child? If not, then stop looking for ghosts that aren't there and focus on how lucky you are to be with such a great guy. The single greatest and most difficult thing to find in life is a partner. I'm not just talking about being involved with someone, but someone which you respect, and who respects you. Someone who you can't wait to get home to each day, or can't wait until they come home to you. Someone who is standing beside you every step of the way in your life's journey, walking hand-in-hand with you. A very very rare thing.

 

I'd guess that in your past, previous relationships had problems, whether caused by you, or the other party, and it has all left a large dent in your 'trust' bone. It's time to wipe those tears of pain, take a deep breath and jump into the 'love' pool. Come on in, the water's fine.