Dating assessment

[snoopie]

As one of my old school friend has recently annonced her admirable news of having her first child with her boyfriend I think about my journey to find love and how to improve my chances. Here goes.

 

I've been trying to find a guy who I can have future with for 5-6months. I've experienced so many ups and downs but overall I haven't been serious about anyone and I've become resistant to going out on anymore dates. Partly because I've been busy but mostly because I feel the amount of men is more than I need/want.

 

There are 3 guys I can think of that were willing to have me as a girlfriend but non havcame close to someone I can see a serious fulfilling future with so I've cut things short to save feelings. 2 have returned asking for another try but again my feelings didn't equal theirs so I think I made the best choice.

 

Of course, I'm still single. I started dating as a way of breaking free of usual habit of a hopless romantic but I haven't so much as gained and friend let alot and boyfriend. Others think that because I wish to be with a musician who is creative, out going, intellectual and interested travelling that I can only find this sort of perosn at university. I did infact meet such a person at university but is it to be that these people can not be found outside of educational settings. Does articulate, talented and worldly exist only in those that have a degree? Or is it a middle class stereotype?

 

Ok so, people my age seem to either be in class, expanding their minds and enjoying similar things to me whereas those that haven't work in 9-5 settings conforming to a life of responsiblity and adult freedoms but surely there is a cross over. Where would you go to meet these people or is uni my only chance or do I have a third option?

 

Say hi if you have any experience of this or can freely say you don't fit these social settings. There must be some hope out there?

[RedDress]

Well... people need to eat. That's just a fact of life. So - logic states that either they are at school being fed off student loans OR they are working 9-5. The other two options are that he's independently wealthy (if you find this guy - let us know where they hang out. LOL!) or that he's mooching off his parents (while not attending uni or working - which not many parents would be OK with). Most people simply don't make enough money making music to make a living.

 

Another option would be that he is working while travelling to get from country to country. Many people do this while they are young. You need to be travelling to meet them. You can find them at most any hostel and at many tourist destinations. Have you had a chance to travel much?

[snoopie]

I agree. I myself have had jobs unrelated to my passion. And careers in music are chosen as long term goals and rarely happen immediately (they also rarely happen without a degree). Bareing in mind that my age range for a guy would be upto 26yrs it's difficult to find a free thinking type that has "a little from colomn A and B".

 

As for travelling, I have indeed. My first travel experience was with a number of complete strangers the other was a trip with a friend I made on the first trip. On both occassions there was fun to be had with various guys but long distance relationships are not my thing. I actually didn't meet anyone from my own country while travelling though I'm sure they're out there. I do understand that this is an option but it has just come to mind that I met a lone traveller in my home town and he and I got on so well we spent an entire day having a whale of a time. Now that he has gone I haven't heard a word from him and again it wouldn't have worked.