Zxascvdf Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 My friend (A common friend between me and my ex, lets call her Q) throws a party every year, there's usually about 15 people and its always a fun night. Anyway, this year I found out that my ex tried to prevent Q from inviting me this year because she didn't want it to be awkward, I told Q that we were still friends and my ex has no right to say who is going to the party because she wasn't throwing it. In the end Q invited me and now i fear that I was only invited because Q didn't want to offend me. My ex got into a rebound relationship about a month after we broke up, they have been together for almost two months now. He, for whatever reason, was not invited to the party. So now I've come to ask the question: What do I do? I'm going to the party for sure, there's no way I'm letting my ex influence my life, out of everyone I will probably know 5 people including my ex. Should I speak to my ex? Exchange pleasantries? Or should I just ignore her? No matter what I'm just going to focus on having fun, but it would be great to have a little advice to go off of Thanks in advance! Link to comment
EgoJoe Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Honestly....I think you would do well to not go. Her "rebound" will probably be there too. Call Q and tell him that something came up. Link to comment
donpeel83 Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Yea, if you dont feel that emotionally strong or ready it might be worth your time going else where, hooking up with some other friends and making out you had a prior arrangement. However, if you do feel a tad naturally non-chalant about the ex etc then go, say hi to her, be pleasent and dont bring up the relationship. However, only you know where you can hang your hat. - Over her, and genuinely not bothered about the rebound and wanting to go to see friends, not to play emotional games with your ex - then go, have fun. - Still cut up, going because you want to try and evoke an emotional response out of her etc - dont go. Link to comment
DylanNotorious Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Of course you were only invited to the party as not to offend you. She does not want you there, so I do not see the point of going anyways if all your going to do is ignore her. Stay home. Link to comment
Data Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Best thing for the both of you is to not go, but like you said no one is going to stop you...BUT!!! let's just say her new dude shows up and she'll be all up on him having a wonderful time. Do you think you will be ok? Link to comment
italiannmf24 Posted December 3, 2011 Share Posted December 3, 2011 Go and do what you would normally do - avoid the ex unless she approaches you. Link to comment
DN Posted December 4, 2011 Share Posted December 4, 2011 Go and do what you would normally do - avoid the ex unless she approaches you.I agree - be pleasant and polite but no need to engage in a conversation unless it is a general one with other people as well. Link to comment
Zxascvdf Posted December 4, 2011 Author Share Posted December 4, 2011 Yea, if you dont feel that emotionally strong or ready it might be worth your time going else where, hooking up with some other friends and making out you had a prior arrangement. However, if you do feel a tad naturally non-chalant about the ex etc then go, say hi to her, be pleasent and dont bring up the relationship. However, only you know where you can hang your hat. - Over her, and genuinely not bothered about the rebound and wanting to go to see friends, not to play emotional games with your ex - then go, have fun. - Still cut up, going because you want to try and evoke an emotional response out of her etc - dont go. While I am still a little cut up (well, just kind of lonely) I honestly do not care about her or her rebound, I already said I'm going to go because I look forward to this party EVERY year. Its a chance to see the people i only get to see once every few months Best thing for the both of you is to not go, but like you said no one is going to stop you...BUT!!! let's just say her new dude shows up and she'll be all up on him having a wonderful time. Do you think you will be ok? A. he wont be there, but if he does show up (uninvited) ill say hi and shake his hand, i stopped caring about what my ex does a few months back. I agree - be pleasant and polite but no need to engage in a conversation unless it is a general one with other people as well. That's what I was thinking, Thanks for the advice! wish me luck and ill post how it went after the party (The party is the Sunday coming up) Link to comment
DN Posted December 5, 2011 Share Posted December 5, 2011 Good luck - hope all goes well for you. Link to comment
Zxascvdf Posted December 11, 2011 Author Share Posted December 11, 2011 An update for anyone who cares: The party went amazing, about an hour after it started I really hit it off with this unbelievably cute girl, i literally forget my ex was even there! A few times i caught her glancing over at me multiple times but she did not once say hi or even acknowledge that I was there, either way I'm damn happy I went, and for anyone struggling to get over their ex; take it from me... there are other women out there, things DO get better! Link to comment
DN Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Did you get a date with the cute girl or a number? Link to comment
doiiiieeezie Posted December 11, 2011 Share Posted December 11, 2011 Good for you, what an ego boost! Hopefully the cute girl is more than just a meet and chat up. I do expect the ex will find a way to contact you soon too, so either way... it's a great step to healing. Link to comment
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