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Had some momentum, but then lost it and now back to NC. Need advice!


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Me and my ex broke up in august (she basically broke up with me) because I moved 3 hours away to college and so I went with the breakup and acted like it wasn't a big deal.


I really still liked her and would think about her non-stop, but I was very patient with NC and figured experiencing college for the first few months would help my situation. Lately things have been going well, but I still think about her all the time even though I'm meeting new women in college.


What happened was around 3 and a half weeks ago in late October I get a text saying that she misses me a lot. I played it off seeming all calm and being myself and then I go on later in our conversation and asked if she wanted to grab lunch or dinner that weekend (since I would be in town) She accepted and that weekend we got dinner. Obviously I was nervous as hell and I didn't how it would go. I've heard so many stories of people when they reunite with their exes after a breakup that they get so nervous, they freeze up and never really ignite that spark again with their ex that they wanted so badly to. We talked for about 2 and a half hours and were forced to leave because the place closed at 11 P.M. It was pretty awesome still having that 'feeling' with her again and could talk about anything with her. There was a little flirtation, but I didn't wanna force anything too soon with her so after dinner I just said good-bye. The next day we talked and ironically my mom was getting married the next weekend (November 6th) ...so I asked her 3 weeks ago today if she would like to be my date for my mom's wedding. (my mom wanted me to get a date) She said yes.


The wedding and reception was awesome. She was an amazing date and even impressed my family. Everything that night went right between us and I even spent the night at her house. I cuddled in her bed with her, but that's it... just pg-13 (that might have been a little too much, but i'll live with my decision) The next day she went to school and I drove back to my college.


But here's the thing. A few days after, things are pretty good. We texted back and forth and called her just to see how she's been, but then a week into seeing each other we were losing some communication. Since I thought we were past the stage of NC, I would text her again and then slowly she'd take longer to respond until finally she didn't text back. (I don't double text either, but I just noticed these things) Three days later I finally initiated a text to her back again and she responded, then I responded on how she's been. And then she didn't respond back.


Well it's been 5 days of NC, but I didn't plan NC because I thought we were past that stage. I really don't know what to do because I don't wanna keep texting her and then her not responding back. But seriously, I thought everything was a lot better since my mom's wedding, but I guess proximity is the main problem.

So my question is what should I do from here? I thought I had some momentum after our wedding date, but I guess not. Should I just continue NC again or try something else? And I just want to say thanksgiving break is about to be here so as a college student, I'm forced to go back home for a week so I'll be in town.


Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

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I think she is confused and doesn't know what she wants. Maybe those dates stirred up some emotions, but not enough for her to make a decision whether she wants to try again or not.

If she ignores you like that, don't text her anymore. Keep going with NC and don't let that affect you. Let her make her mind all on her own. If she wants to talk to you, she will.

You've tried talking to her and being polite and mature about it, if she doesn't want it. There's nothing else you can do.

Just play it cool and continue NC, worst thing you can do is asking her what's going on.


Stay strong my friend.

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Hey bigbang I think that's the best thing for me to do is just play it cool again with NC because that's my best bet. And I do believe you're right about her emotions too. I think maybe she can't handle her emotions and let alone a LDR. But mainly, which is unfortunate for me, I think she still likes me but not enough to be committed. (and maybe she'll never be ready) And unfortunately I think that given everything we've been through, she doesn't wanna fully move on.


Well I mean there's NC, but given the timing, thanksgiving break is around the corner so I'll be in town for a week. Should I contact her when I'm in town or should I just continue with NC?

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