guy I'm talking to freaked out...and now has been MIA. what gives?

[lhc1575]

So I've been talking to this guy for a couple of weeks now, we've hung out once before and I think it went well. We had made plans to do something this past Friday, he was going to come with me and my friends to my friend's birthday party, but at the last minute (I mean like 9:15 that night) he said he felt awkward and wasn't sure if he wanted to go. I told him not to feel awkward, and that he could bring a friend, but when I found out it was mostly girls I told him not to worry about it because then it really would have been awkward for him.

 

He, apparently, has a habit of dirty texting when drinking; we do that sometimes as fun just to joke around when sober, but when he drinks he does it a little more seriously. I was already a little bummed out that he had cancelled last minute and didn't feel like dealing with this behavior (red flag number 1) so I shut down the conversation and said I was walking out the door then with my friends. He ended up freaking out, blowing up my phone with texts. Long story short: He basically guilt tripped me for no reason, wanted to know why I wasn't my usual playful self, mentioning how he felt stupid that he thought we "had that trust," and ultimately told me that we should just be friends. When had we not been friends? Had I missed that memo on my desk? We hung out once! I told him we would talk when we were both sober.

 

Next day he texted me and told me he would be at work til 9. I said, "If you're not going to be nice...please don't bother." I didn't want more drama and I can't handle someone yelling at me when we aren't even dating. He wound up blowing up my phone again, mentioning the same things as the night before and ending it with "Maybe we should just be friends. I'll be seeing you around." I was so sick of the drama at this point that I smoothed it over and told him we should just move on. After that, things have returned to normal, but I feel like he has cooled towards me...which I think is a blessing in disguise because he seems unstable.

 

My question is: What the F is up with this behavior?

[Fudgie]

Sounds like he is a very volatile person...both drunk and sober. He blew up your phone both drunk and sober. He sounds very reactive and dramatic. Yuck.

[annie24]

yeah, yuck. i think you're better off ditching this guy. friends and otherwise!

[MyNinja]

Please do yourself the biggest favor and cut all contact with this fellow. He is obviously unstable and shows stalkerish tendencies and controlling behavior. Going through this within two weeks time is more than a sign that you should RUN the other way. He sounds very unpredictable, hon.

 

Until we meet again...be safe