Tantric Love - Can it Happen With More Than One Person in a Lifetime

[Silverbirch]

A lot of people won't understand what this is about. Probably especially younger people. I hope it doesn't offend anyone, and just skip it and don't concern yourself if you don't understand what this is about. If you understand it, please post your opinion or you can IM me if you prefer.

 

 

 

I just couldn't bring myself to post this on the sex board. It just doesn't feel right. It was about a lot more than a physical act. It was something very special for him too, and I know the fact that everyday life and problems got in the way, and it hurt and angered him that this was affected. He wasn't prepared to wait or put effort and time in - largely an ego thing - he couldn't invest emotionally in it at that point in time - he was so caught up in anger.

 

The last 2 times he saw me, told me how hurt he was that "I" took that away from him, but that he was not prepared to give me any chances or put in any effort.

 

I never even really knew about Tantra before him and neither did he - it just happened spontaneously. I wonder a fair bit if it is just a once in a lifetime thing or will this happen again in my life one day. I know it happened when I felt safe and happy in the relationship, and I know at least I was emotionally available and thought he was too. The most amazing part was the deep tantric kiss with the exchange of breath which the rest all seemed to branch out from.

 

Has this happened for anyone here with more than one partner.

 

Thank You.

[Xylitol]

Tantra's specific goal is idealistically not to avoid problems and obstacles but to take responsibility for ones own life and therefore confront the difficulties and conditioned emotions and to overcome them. The melting together of female-male is not something that points back to sex, but rather thru reincarnations where the soul experiences all the aspects of male and female thru different genders in different lives in order to come to a higher form of spiritual consiousness thru what it learns in all these lives.

 

So i am sorry to say this wasn't tantric love, its seriously doubtfull that this was anything other then just the sex that made you feel liberated, afteral he isn't a person who confronts his problems rather avoids them, not only does a tantric experience not appear normally via sex, rather via revelations or visions or thru gained knowledge and experience thru more meditative circumstances. I don't think there was any 'revelation', i mean could you tell us what 'universal insight' you gained from this experience? I doubt there is any. However i don't want to discredit your experience, i am sure it must have felt wonderfull.

 

For you i sympathise and feel sorry that your relationship didn't work out as you planned it, however i think that if you put your love and emotions in someone who you trust and love, you can experience this again.

[Silverbirch]

Thank you. Yes, I did get a revelation/insight, but for me, it's very, very personal even if I told you what it was, you likely wouldn't consider it personal. I just don't want to share it.

 

I have regrets that I put myself in the position where I had this type of intimacy with a person who turned out not to be genuinely emotionally available, and will never make that mistake again. I did trust and love him, but I was wrong, and because of that, I opened myself up to feel a lot more hurt than I should have.

[Xylitol]

Well the revelation or insight learned from this person should be that trust takes time. Don't open up yourself too quickly to someone ,because you don't know whether that person will hurt you or not. I personally cannot stand it however when people claim to have had some sort of revelation or insight then refusing to share it, only makes it all the more untrustworthy and doubtfull that there was a revelation to beging with. For if there was some wisdom in it, and its not shared with others, then others cannot benefit from this insight. But i can imagine tho that if it was during such an intense moment that you hesitate to tell about it. Well, whenever you're ready we'll hear it i guess.

[90_hour_sleep]

Thank you. Yes, I did get a revelation/insight, but for me, it's very, very personal even if I told you what it was, you likely wouldn't consider it personal. I just don't want to share it.

 

I have regrets that I put myself in the position where I had this type of intimacy with a person who turned out not to be genuinely emotionally available, and will never make that mistake again. I did trust and love him, but I was wrong, and because of that, I opened myself up to feel a lot more hurt than I should have.

 

i think this is the nature of love, and trust. vulnerability is what makes these things truly possible. if you're willing to open yourself to pain, to hurt, to the very essence of vulnerability...this is what leads to fulfillment in relationships.

 

i can see what you're saying, silverbirch...and i have one question that i'd be inclined to ask. do you think that it's possible that the hurt you've felt has nothing to do with having opened yourself to loving and trusting...and perhaps all to do with the disappointment you felt when you discovered that your expectations about who this man was were revealed as inaccurate? i think it would be unfortunate if you were to close yourself to a similar experience based on the outcome here. yes...you can learn from this. but perhaps the lesson to be learned has something to do with realizing that loving someone has little to do with your expectations of that person. if it's all about the expectations...perhaps the love that one feels in this circumstance is for one's own expectations, as opposed to one's love for another. you know?