What does this mean?

[Noggy27]

Hi

 

I have been in no contact with my ex for 2 weeks now. We started talking again last week as she phoned me. She was nice and said she was wondering how I was getting on. I acted all nice and stuff and we started mailing eachother again. Then all of a sudden she says I am contacting her too much? I was just replieng to her mails so I dont get it.

 

Anyway I have decided to go back to NC again to give her more space. I also need the space because I still havent got used to her seeing this new guy she is dating. She said to me she cant understand why I am bothered about this guy as she has only been on 2 dates with him and as far as she is concerned hes just a date. She said " I dont want to get into another relationship I just like having men around me in my life, its not a big deal but I plan to continue to see him" What the £$%£$ does that mean?

 

Thats like saying, " I am not an alcoholic but I want to keep drinking as alcohol is a part of my life?"

 

Can one of you women interpret that for me please?

 

She also said she wants to be my friend and I mean a lot to her and she also keeps saying that I am looking good and looking after myself and that its obviously because I am single again.

[r6a6r6]

Don't contact her. Even when she emails you. Do not.

 

I've learned the hard way.

 

She doesn't see how her seeing another guy is a problem for you? I've gotten that. What a bunch of BS!

 

Let her see what mistake she made, she can't if you're still in her life.

 

Hang in there!

[rich46]

Mind games. She is put out because you haven't been initiating contact with her, so she is trying to turn the tables and make out she has the power! Just keep doing what you are doing, but don't be so keen to reply to her emails. If she says you are contacting her too much, don't contact her at all!

[Noggy27]

Ok

 

Got a few questions for you..

 

1: What is this guy to her? If hes a rebound and she has no interest, why is she pointing out to me that she will keep seeing him? Is she testing to see how I react? Is this a relationship or what?

 

2: When I go to NC she contacts me. I have been acting aloof and kind but I think I have been telling her too much. I told her I missed her and she said I only missed her because I was used to her.

 

3: She Does play mind games and shes better at them than me I admit that, thats why I am asking these questions. Whats a good way at the stage I am at to take control again?

 

4: When she speaks to me, shes either very cold or treats me like a kid. Why is she doing that? You know giving me the "you are doing well, you are going to be just fine" Crap..

 

5: Does she still care for me? Whats a good way to find out if this is just a game for her or if she really loves me and is contacting me just to pander to her own selfish needs?

 

6: Are there any tests or things I can do to get a better idea of where I stand? What results should I expect and what do they mean?

 

7: Is there a chance in hell I will get her back?

 

8: What way should I act to gain control of her silly mind games?

 

9: What does it mean when she keeps telling me I look good and healthy and that she is happy I am going out and doing more with my friends? Is this a sign of uncertainty or is she trying to move me along?

 

10: What do I do now? She will keep phoning me and I have been nice to her. I know that if I ignore her complety she will probably find it easier to get over me and move on? Whats the stage where you realise you still have a chance?

[Day_Walker]

i get the feeling that people dont understand what NC means, it means NO CONTACT, I believe that it doesnt have anything to do with giving the other person space, but that its part of the healing process. Speaking to that person prematurely will only bring up old feelings and will put more thoughts in your mind. Its not important to analyze what your ex says or does, it is important to realize that its over and you need to move on. Keep up the NC and if she does contact you then dont respond, its harsh but thats what you need to do.

[Ravens_eternity]

man noggy

i know how you feel cuz i'm in the same place and hell i don't know what to do. i tryed everything. even nothing and i still i don't know how to get her back

[kekep]

as a girl, i can tell you this chick is playing games with your head. obviously, she thinks you are her doormat or she wouldn't so readily admit to be dating someone else because she'd be worried that you'd go off and find someone else. prove to her that you are fine without her and don't contact her. even if she contacts you, i'd either avoid her calls or pick up and say "sorry, i'm running out the door. maybe we'll chat later." and don't call back. leave it at that. if this girl truly loved you, she would not be trying to make you miserable in this way. she is just being vindictive and trying to make you jealous as a test. WOMEN!

[Noggy27]

She didnt admit to it...

 

I found out by mistake that she was seeing some other guy. She confessed to it when I spoke to her last time and said what I mentioned above. She said that she never told me because she didnt see it was a big deal to her as hes only a guy shes been on a few dates with. She said she never told me about it as it was just a few dates and she didnt want to hurt me.

 

She sent me a text today but I have ignored it. It wasnt important anyway.

[Noggy27]

can anyone offer me some more advice?

 

I appreciate all the responses so far and they have all been good. She sent me a few texts today about silly things and I have just ignored them. How do i stay way from her and do NO contacts as you put it if shes emailing me? Isnt her emailing me what I want? What does all that crap i posted on the first post mean? Do you guys think I stand a chance here?

 

I really miss her