CrazyMiner Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Hi everyone, Just a quick question really. For those who want a bit of background you can read my NC/LC journal by clicking on the following link: Basically, the ex is coming to the house tomorrow to pick up some shoes, make up etc. I'm not going to be in as I'm out with some friends. She loves lilies (the flower), and although a reconcilliation is off the cards at the moment she has left a door open to it in the future (when we have both had a chance to heal from the break up etc) and I also left a door open when I sent her a NC/LC letter, to which she agreed, to the NC/LC at least. Basically, should I buy some lilies? I know it's a bit of a stupid question, and I don't mean for her to have them or take them away, but just to have in a vase on one of the side tables. She will notice them, and she'll know that I got them knowing that she was coming round... should I do it? Personally I think it'll make her smile, or at the very least have a few extra thoughts about me. Plus it might make things easier for her seeing as she'll be coming to an empty house to take away some of her belongings. I know some are going to say "she broke up with you, she doesn't deserve nice things etc etc etc", but I hold no ill against her and just feel it would be a nice gesture. Any thoughts? Link to comment
NANsense Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Buy one lilly & have it wrapped nicely & leave it on top of her things...no card...just the flower Link to comment
Success Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 If you get no response from her after leaving a lilly, will you be ok with that? If so, then go for it. Link to comment
DigitalSpy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 I like NANsense's idea. Its a nice idea a single lilly wrapped and left with her belongings to my mind may be better. But I don't really understand what the purpose of the flower is, are you hoping to achieve something by this? I mean lilly's symbolise the following: Hope, Faith, Renewal, Passion. These could be interoperated that you hope to reconcile... But on the other hand they also symbolize: Birth, Purity, Promise, innocence and eroticism.... Do what your gut tells you Link to comment
CrazyMiner Posted May 10, 2011 Author Share Posted May 10, 2011 Hi guys, thanks for the replies! I actually meant that I was just thinking of buying a bunch of white lilies and putting them in a vase somewhere where she would see them. She'd know that I had brought them because she was coming round as I don't buy flowers for myself. However, I do like the single lily without a card idea! That sounds really romantic, but I'm worried it could have a negative effect. At the moment, she isn't looking for me to try and win her back, she wants us to have time to find out who we each are as individuals, and I think she might get a bit annoyed by the single lily. Just as an example, around 3 - 4 weeks ago (4 weeks after we separated) I put some romantic songs that I knew she would like onto her Spotify music playlist as it would automatically update the playlist on her phone and she listens to the playlist every day on the way to and from work. When she finally heard the songs, she first called me up and said that it was a really creative idea but not to do it again, however an hour later she called up and had a bit of a go at me, saying I was 'invading her privacy'. It's really difficult, as I know she still has feelings for me but has a bit of a pride issue and so wants to follow through with the separation, at the very least for the next couple of months. However, she may infact like the lily idea, but she also may not as with what happened with the music. What do I do ENA people? Link to comment
endy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Don't do it. Stand your ground and give her the space she requested. Stop worrying about what YOU should do. What YOU need to do is only worry about yourself and work on yourself. That way IF she does ever want to get back together, she see's the new improved you. The lily is not going to do anything that the music didn't do. Sorry, but I've been here and done that. You need to start putting yourself first. Have some pride for yourself too. It is a romantic thing to do, but it's not the time to be romantic. Link to comment
endy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Also how are you going to react if she responds negative to it? How is that going to effect you personally and emotionally? When someone says they want space give it them... indefinitely until they tell you they don't want space. You are looking at this as a way to get back with her and I understand... but you need to realize that may not happen and begin moving on. You are just going to postpone it if you don't. I'm sorry that sounds so negative, but I just feel I would need to protect my best interests in that situation. Link to comment
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