Tryptophan Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Dumpee texted me happy easter. I replied and wished a happy easter back, but he lingered and kept asking questions. He's insisted on maintaining contact though I've tried to tell him it's better off as no-contact. Isn't that what all dumpees want? For the ex to just no reach out to them anymore and not cause more harm? It's not like I moved on to someone else. If anything, I'm loving being single and appreciate the freedom I have. He hasn't pushed for a reconciliation or is asking to get back together which I liked because it made it easier on me. However, he still insists on contacting me. It's confusing because I know for a fact there's other girls he can 'talk' to and be close to. I'm not sure if romantically but when we were together, he seemed more interested in them so why is he all of a sudden interested in reaching out to me? Link to comment
dumpedinshock Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 Maybe he still loves u? Link to comment
Eocsor Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 If contact with him is bugging you that much simply tell him straight up that you don't wish to hear from him again. Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 Maybe he still loves u? I love him too but I'm still slightly angry at him because when we were together, he would flirt with other girls and whatnot. I thought what he wanted was out too so it really confuses me that he still wants to be in my life. If contact with him is bugging you that much simply tell him straight up that you don't wish to hear from him again. I did but like I said, he insists. I changed my number a while back and he got it through a mutual friend (didn't say who) so I really had no choice. I didn't want to put him through more so I didn't want to do it again. It's strange. Link to comment
kingofatlantis Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 If he really won't stop leaving you alone threaten to follow up with legal action that'll get him to stop only as a last resort though. Sometimes people don't take a hint till its shown with full force. Link to comment
JonasWaingaro Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 No, not at all. Most dumped want the dumper back and all the contact that they had before. So they'll keep in contact as much as they can. At some point most dumped realize the pseudo contact isn't worth the pain and go NC but not by choice rather by necessity. He's not there yet I guess. Or perhaps he's weening himself off you, has been to known to happen as well. Also remember, some people want what they don't have much more than what do have. Immature but common enough. Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 If he really won't stop leaving you alone threaten to follow up with legal action that'll get him to stop only as a last resort though. Sometimes people don't take a hint till its shown with full force. I guess that would be the next step but that would really hurt him. I don't want to hurt him and was as nice about the breakup as I could have been. I stressed the NC was for our own good, which I honestly thought it was but he doesn't seem to think of it that way. You would think that as a 'dumper', this would boost my self-esteem like many people think it does but it only leaves me wondering as to why. No, not at all. Most dumped want the dumper back and all the contact that they had before. So they'll keep in contact as much as they can. At some point most dumped realize the pseudo contact isn't worth the pain and go NC but not by choice rather by necessity. He's not there yet I guess. Or perhaps he's weening himself off you, has been to known to happen as well. Also remember, some people want what they don't have much more than what do have. Immature but common enough. It might be the case. It just felt like he was just using me to wean himself off slowly until he could move on to the next girl, which he seems to be doing already. And again, he's getting really close to one (Facebook is evil), so I don't see why he's still bothering with me. I wish he would just leave me alone. Link to comment
kingofatlantis Posted April 26, 2011 Share Posted April 26, 2011 I guess that would be the next step but that would really hurt him. I don't want to hurt him and was as nice about the breakup as I could have been. You're no longer together and you should always be putting your well-being first. It may hurt him but if he won't leave you alone the only way you can get the message accross is to hurt his feelings with legal actions or another simple "Leave me alone". It sucks because you never want to hurt someone you once loved but sometimes it has to be done. He's being selfish and inconsiderate of your choice for N/C no respect what so ever for you so no respect to him. Link to comment
Tryptophan Posted April 26, 2011 Author Share Posted April 26, 2011 You're no longer together and you should always be putting your well-being first. It may hurt him but if he won't leave you alone the only way you can get the message accross is to hurt his feelings with legal actions or another simple "Leave me alone". It sucks because you never want to hurt someone you once loved but sometimes it has to be done. He's being selfish and inconsiderate of your choice for N/C no respect what so ever for you so no respect to him. I think that's true. He didn't respect me during the relationship too by being with other girls too so I guess I'm respecting him too much now. Thanks, I needed a reminder of that. Link to comment
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