girlfriend just dumped me cuz she thinks I don't trust her

[serenitynow]

Ok this came as a shock to me. Yesterday was the first day she got back from camp, she was gone 5 weeks. And before she left she told me we would be able to talk a lot and I had nothing to worry about. So, she ended up talking to me 2 hours total and not even at all in the last 2.5 weeks. I was really upset about this, so yesterday I kind of went off on her a bit, I mean it wasn't that bad though. And after about 10 mins she was like "Ok obviously this relationship isn't going to work because you have repeatedly proven you don't trust me. I hope we can still be friends and be mature about this." But then I had to go so I couldn't even talk about it to her. She said that I didn't trust that she tried her hardest to talk to me, trust that she was upset about the whole thing too, and trust her about this rumor. The rumor was that she had sex with 2 guys at once and I asked her about it before we started going out and she said it wasn't true. So I believed her, even though I heard a lot of evidence it was true. But, then about a month ago I heard undenyable evidence I thought at the time. So I brought it up again, but my intentions were to point out to her that some of her friends were spreading the rumor so she'd keep an eye on them. It wasn't to question whether or not it was true even though I will admit the thoughts were flying around in my mind and I was going paranoid. She was my first girlfriend, and everything was going so great before she left for 5 weeks. I want her back. I've been depressed this summer without her and I wrote a long letter to her explaining that was why I was so upset that she didn't talk to me, because I felt like no one cared about me and was there for me to help me except her and I couldn't even talk to her. I said things like "I do trust you. I'll tell you anything you want to know. I'll tell you ____ ( I tell her something I've never told anyone). I'll tell you _____ . I'll tell you that I have the smell of your perfume memorized and everytime I smell it my heart beats faster and I'm happier." And I told her how much she means to me and how this was a misunderstanding and how I over-reacted and I was sorry. But, I don't think it will work. I don't know what I will do if I don't get her back. Could she just have been saying that because she was mad at me and now regrets it? If I wrote her an amazing letter is there a chance I can get her back? Some of my close friends are her best friends so if they tell her to keep me will that help? This is quite possibly the worst time of my life...

[Roffler]

Well, I'm amazed at how many similar situations I find myself in, for better or worse =\

 

Anyways, if she doesn't want to have anything to do with you, I'm not sure there is anything you can do. However, if there is some will left in her, you have a chance, if it is what you want to persue, and guessing, I'd say it is.

SO...

Give her the later. Make sure everything you say in it is very clear, don't be cowardly about it but don't be too rash either. You merely want to get your point-of-view accross. If it becomes to much of a struggle, move on. As you said, she is your first girlfriend, chances are you will never forget her, but it may be time to move on, based on circumstance. You have shown commitment by waiting 5 weeks, but if she doesn't reciprocate and dis-trusts you trusting her (if that makes sense), then well, you're young and there are plenty of fish in the sea.