Need Some Advice

[Chris3131]

So I need some advice about this girl I've been seeing. We've been on 5 dates - gone to a couple of restaurants, hung out at some bars, and this last one we spent most of the day together. She made dinner and we watched the basketball games at her place. She's a nice girl, a great cook, we both have a bunch of similar interests...but I'm still not feeling that "bam" spark. it just seems like something, or a connection, is somewhat missing. We haven't had any physical interaction either, no kiss or anything. I'm new to the area and we're both kind of shy - and I've been on the fence (and still am) about her and seeing if my attraction will grow..but so far, it's not. I'm just like 'eh'. And since I'm 'eh', that's why I haven't made a move. Is there something wrong with me? I can't figure it out - either why I'm not that attracted, or whether I should keep seeing her to see if something comes or just move on since I haven't felt that spark yet. Or should I just relax and enjoy it? What are your thoughts?

[arrakis77]

Does the thought of kissing her sound exciting or uncomfortable? You've been out together a number of times so you must be attracted to something. Get closer, touch and kiss her. It's about what you feel when you do. Watch her reactions too and don't move too fast. Sometimes things build over time. Good luck!

[Frosted_Cherry]

Does the thought of kissing her sound exciting or uncomfortable? You've been out together a number of times so you must be attracted to something. Get closer, touch and kiss her. It's about what you feel when you do. Watch her reactions too and don't move too fast. Sometimes things build over time. Good luck!

 

I agree with this. 5 dates and still no kiss? While that is perfectly fine if she is okay with it, most people want a kiss by the 2nd date, or even first. Start to get more physical by touching her (and by that I dont mean jump right into sex)

[catfeeder]

I agree with the above. If the idea of kissing someone repulses you, that's pretty much your answer.

[Ms Darcy]

My own thought is that dating in general is so much pressure. Why not pull back -- don't spend as much time together and just have fun? Don't make a move but take the time to get to know her a little. If a spark doesn't grow, at least a friendship can.

[Bluebelle1976]

I think if you have seen each other 5 times then you must be enjoying each others company at the very least. You have mentioned in your post that you are both quite shy, so this may have something to do with it and she could also be sat on the fence waiting to see if the spark develops. I agree with Ms Darcy dont put yourself under any pressure and continue to enjoy spending time together, as time goes on you will know whether it has the potential to develop.