People who "suffer" through high school

[mammadon]

I think that in life, acceptance brings peace and acceptance often sets one free.

 

With that in mind, and knowing the psychology/mentality of teens in high school, does getting harassed count as genuine suffering?

 

This is not to be offensive, but I think a lot of suffering in life would be greatly alleviated if people accepted the reality of situations, and learnt to manage that reality. The reality of younger people is that they can be eager to brag, or eager to show themselves as superior, or not as accepting or non-judgmental as other groups in society may be.

[rocio]

With that in mind, and knowing the psychology/mentality of teens in high school, does getting harassed count as genuine suffering?

 

Yes, absolutely. High school can be the worst kind of hell for unpopular students.

 

Didn't really understand the rest of your post though, sorry.

[mammadon]

It is reality, and we should accept reality for what it is. This would lead to the development of better coping skills for unpopular kids.

[shes2smart]

The reality is young humans need to be taught how to behave in socially acceptable/polite/civil ways...not excused by saying "kids will be kids."

[lady00]

The reality is young humans need to be taught how to behave in socially acceptable/polite/civil ways...not excused by saying "kids will be kids."

 

I agree but kids still needs to be taught coping mechanisms for dealing with the kids who are not taught to be civil. Same goes for adults...I know many people who have not outgrown their lack of civility and continue this behavior well into adulthood. For the most part, it isn't manifested in physical bullying as it was in grade school but rather in other forms of rudeness and bullying.

[Firiel]

Suffering would be greatly alleviated if we could just accept the reality of a situation. For instance, being able to think, "These people are treating me very poorly. That shows their poor character. I'm not sure I'd like to be friends with people like them anyway. I'm better off just letting their hate slide off my back than trying to win these people's approval."

 

BUT. That is so much easier said than done. It's a skill, and like all skills, it takes time to learn. I think many people get better at shrugging off rude and unnecessary words/actions as they get older, but high schoolers are in a time of their lives when they are really beginning to get a handle on their emotions and treat them in an adult way. It's very hard to truly be able to utilize this concept at that age. Heck, it's still hard for adults. Look at everyone going through break-ups. It's hard for logic to trump real, true emotion.

[mammadon]

My own opinion is that not everybody in life will be kind, welcoming and accommodating to others.

[shes2smart]

My own opinion is that not everybody in life will be kind, welcoming and accommodating to others.

 

Perhaps I am misunderstanding your posts.

 

What I'm getting from them is that you are putting the burden of dealing with these situations on the "victims" saying they need to learn coping mechanisms rather than acknowledging there is an equal responsibility to teach kids how to behave.

 

Yes, there are adults who exhibit poor behavior as well...and I think a lot of times it's because they've been acting like asshats since their teen years and no one bothered to correct them or call them on it, so they either have no clue or feel like they can get away it.

[nikkinoodles]

I had a pretty crappy school experience. I admit it did teach me a few things, like learning to be strong in my own beliefs, learning that you wont get on with everyone one you meet, and learning how to deal with people in these situations.

I will also say though that teenagers have enough problems without having to deal with problems such ad bullying, and they are at a very emotional state in their lives and I have seen some people not cope aswell as I did and it messed them up.

I do wonder what has go on is some people's/kid's lives to make them act badly?