How do yo guys deal with it?

[Duderanomi]

My now ex-girlfriend broke up with me because she wasn't in love with me anymore. In a way, I guess I deserved it. Anyhow, now she wants to stay friends and see if perhaps our flame will be rekindled in the future.

 

The problem is that right now, I'm hurting pretty bad. I can't stop thinking about her and I just want to call her every minute that I'm not busy with something. I would really love to stay friends with her too, but all I want to do in her presense is lean over and kiss her.

I'm not too sure how she's feeling about me, since she has reached over and held my hand in the most unexpected times.

 

I'm just so damn sad, I've never been this sad, so I'm just wondering if anyone can tell me how to deal with this kind of sadness.

[MissJBug]

I think that you just need to respect her wishes and let her deal with the problem. Who knows, there might be more to the story. All's I know is, If she is holding your hand sometimes, than she still loves you very very much (from experience). Maybe shes testing you, to see if you could wait for her.

 

Do something back, OUT OF THE BLUE, just tell her "look I dont mean to reuin today but, I want you to know Im always here for u and that you look beautiful today".... if the expression on her face is a smile...

 

Shell be back

[chai714]

Pull your boat up next to mine cause we're in the same ocean. The only thing I can recommend right now, is to go out and do things. If you make a move on her and cause her to be uncomfortable, it's over for good. Before you do anything, ask yourself do you want that? NO!

 

Take some time off from her to get a better picture of what is going on. Sometimes, you have to take a few steps back so you can see the whole picture. I know, this is hard. If you're anything like I am, you lose sleep, are not hungry, feel empty, lonely . . . I feel you man! Just stay strong, and take time. For some f'd up reason, time will only tell whether or not you will end up together. From what you said though, it sounds like she does care cause you said, "she wants to stay friends and see if perhaps our flame will be rekindled in the future. " If in fact she did say this, that is PROOF that you're not counted out. It's not over till it's over, and it doesn't seem like it's over yet. I know it's hard, but just give it time, and don't make ANY moves on her, as this could put unnecessary pressure on her AND you. Relax, slow baby steps. This is a very volatile situation you're in. YOUR actions dictate HER response, so just keep it light and DO NOT discuss anything about your relationship yet . . .

[Scout]

I know how you feel. It's a very difficult time, and you have to struggle to keep control of your emotions and your words. That's why being "friends" with her right now will be very hard on you. You will want more, and it will kill you that you can't have it, at least not at that time.

 

It's a difficult new relationship to enter with someone you were once romantically involved with.

[AngelWater]

I too know how you all feel. My boyfriend just told me lastnight that he doesn't think he is "in love" with me. I guess the same sort of thing that your girlfriend said to you Chai. My man said that he knows he still loves me as a person and as a friend, but he doesn't think he loves me romantically anymore. It is just SO hard to make the pain go away. I agree with the not eating and sleeping. And maybe it's different for girls, but crying 24 hours a day while having huge pounding headaches. You are the hungriest you have ever been but every time you take a bite of food it tastes like acid, or platic, anything but food. You are so tired, yet as soon as your head hits the pillow, all you do is rethink, and drive yourself crazy about the blur of events that have just happened.

 

I am here for you guys, 'cause I truly understand when you say this is the worst pain you have ever gone through. I am going through it too.