Should I give him another chance???...

[Pink]

I broke up with my boyfriend 6 weeks ago. Now I'm confused with his behaviour...

You know, the last time he said that he doesn't care about me anymore but it's not the way I see from his behaviour.

 

He's dating some women at the moment in order to make me jealous, but everytime he did that he was the one who finally got jealous to see me around with another man.

 

He never put his eyes off me in every occasion!!! He always wants to know what I am doing....

I was on the party last week & I met him there. He tried to make me jealous again by teasing women around. Once again, I didn't even pay attention to what he did because I had a very interesting conversation with a guy whom I met there. I know he kept an eye on me with this guy & finally he sat right next to me even though he didn't do anything at all(maybe he was just curious with what we talked about because I talked with this guy for hours).

 

The next one was when my male colleague sat me down on his lap & by accident it was happened in front of him. I could see he always tried to sneak around to look at us & seemed jealousy eated him up so finally he walked near us in order to see whether my colleague's hands roaming around on my body or not.

 

On the dance floor, he always watched me & my partner dancing even though he has his own partner to dance. My dance partner knew about that & was a bit bothered & asked me who is he...

 

Last but not least, one day he saw me shared pizza together with my male friend. A few days later he went to a pizza place with one of his 'women' & when he saw me there, he suddenly asked the woman whether she wants to share pizza with him (in order to take revenge on me the other day).

 

Well, there are many more which I can't mention here about his funny behaviour.....

 

At the moment we only talked on professional basis but seems he tries to use it in order to make me to see him everyday at his office. Honestly, I still care about him & I'm happy we can talk again now.

 

My question now is... Do you think he still cares about me (if you see from his 'acting' above)???.... Please be informed that we broke up because he was very jealous with all my male friends/colleagues because I'm quite popular in our office.

 

Should I give him another chance???.... What should I do to show him that I want to give him another chance if he's really waiting for that?...

 

Please advise....

[kali171]

You both still have some sort of feelings for each other - as very little time has passed since you broke it off with him. It seems that he is hurt and trying to seek revenge in his own way by trying to make you jealous. Is it working?

 

However, you need to remind yourself why you broke up with him in the first place (his jealous nature which he seems to still exhibit) and seriously reconsider how you would feel if you were in a relationship with a jealous person again. Is his jealous nature something that you can deal with or does it lead you posessiveness that keeps you from living your life happily and freely.

 

When you can answer this question, then you will know what to do.

[Mr. Good Man]

I'll keep it simple and to the point....run very fast away from this person.

 

You definitely deserve better! Plus, when have you known anyone going back to someone actually being happier?

 

Do a search on the forum for "getting back" or "jealousy" and read what others have written. Then you will know what to do.

 

Just know if you give him a second chance you will end up paying dearly for it.

[kali171]

I agree with Mr goodman

[Pink]

Thanks for the advice!

Let me honest about what I feel... You know, honestly... I still care about him so much, that's the problem

When he's going out with some women out there, I don't feel jealous because I know he does that in order to make me jealous!!! Moreover, sometimes I do feel guilty because I was stupid & didn't know what he wants from me (So far I thought that he didn't want to be seen exclusively with me on the public but now I know that he wants the opposite).

After 6 weeks breaking up, I think I begin to know that he wants to be admitted as my 'special friend' in front of my friends because now everytime we interact at the office it seems he wants all people know that I am with him!!!

In my mind I always want to give him a second chance & I'll try to treat him as he wants because I don't mind either people know about us.... I want to see whether it works between us.... But I want to make sure first whether he still cares about me as much as I do or not????.... Otherwise, it'll be useless for me to give him another chance

 

Please advise...

[a_little_sparrow]

Hey Pink,

 

While I think that you should think seriously about what Mr. Good Man and kali have said, I think the answer to your question, "Does he have feelings for me still?" is yes. Obviously I can't say that for certain because I'm only hearing your side of the story, and you're hopeful that he does have feelings. But after only six weeks, and after him being the one dumped, I think it's pretty safe to say he is still interested.

 

If you two manage to get back together though, I would definitely think about asking him to start dealing with his jealousy problem. It is a horrible sickness that can sour an otherwise good relationship. It's possible to at least get the person thinking about it, and hopefully repairing it.

[Pink]

Well, after I think about this I decided to give him one more chance because I don't want to deny myself that I still care about him & it seems he does too...

 

Can anyone help me to give advise what should I do to let him know that I still care about him & want to give him a second chance???... Do men like to be given a second chance by raising (again) our topic (jealousy) before we start all over again?... Or it's better NOT to mention it again in front of him???.....

 

Please HELP me because this will be the first time for me to give somebody a chance in relationship

[a_little_sparrow]

Hey Pink,

 

Well, others might have other opinions on this, but I think a letter would be nice. Though I don't know if this guy of yours is the type to receive letters and then act on them. A couple reasons a letter is nice is because it gives you a chance to talk about why you broke up in the first place, and how you hope he can deal with those things.

 

But then I guess the more conventional route is to invite him to lunch and then bring up the relationship, and just tell him you were thinking that the two of you should give it another go. Yeah, it's risky, because you don't know how he's going ot react. But it's just as hard telling someone you want to break up.

 

But from what you're saying I think this guy is still interested. And it's still pretty close to the breakup.

 

Good luck.

[Pink]

Thanks for the advice....

You know, as for myself writing a letter probably would be better idea but I'm also tempted not to discuss about it again, I just don't want to hurt each other again Well, maybe I should email him???....

 

At the moment he's out of country for 3 weeks & I'll be out of country as well next week. Without knowing each other's planning we found out that we'll return in the same day. We'll be in the same airport & flight to return!!!

 

You know, I really want to use this moment to get him back... We have about 2 hours at the airport & 4 hours on the plane. Do you think it's good idea?... What should I do then?... Should I be the one who go near him & start the conversation???....

Do you think it's okay or annoying instead???....