Losing it

[dancingcolors]

I am losing it. I can't even stand to read things on here anymore. It has been too long that I am alone. I am beyond lonely. and I haven't had sex but once in 15 months. I don't even care about my ex as much, as just the being alone part. I think about being promiscuous,but I don't even know who that would be. The guy from the weekend, who wanted to take me home wrote me an email today. I wrote him back, but haven't heard anything. And I don't really think I could be with him, plus he is like 16 years younger than me. Plus my car broke down 2 weeks ago, and now I have to find a new car. It all feels so hard. I can't even make a plan to meet someone from craigslist, because I need to keep my eveings open to look for a car with my roommate. I know you understand how I feel. Thanks for being there.

[tmp02161248]

Exactly how I feel, except I guess I'm fortunate because it's been 12 months; I would love to be promiscuous, strange, to have that word applied to a man, but don't have anyone to be promiscuous with. Women overlook me without even getting to know the real me.

 

All of this pent up sexual energy and yet no outlet except my loyal hands. I go to a singles bar and will find myself alone drinking by myself. If I go with my friends then they are who I hang out with for the evening, no new prospects, maybe one of my friend's gfs and that's all.

 

The worst part is not knowing when the dry spell will end.

[waveseer]

Do you socialize in mixed company? I set a goal to talk to a man face to face every day. It's been so long since I was close to a man that I started feeling like they were a different species. It doesn't matter who it is because I'm not looking for a date, more like practicing making conversation to prepare myself. I've been doing this for a while now, and I haven't missed a day yet.

[Sparkly Eyes]

Life is not supposed to be easy, unfortunately. I'm not gonna tell you to be positive and everything will just fall in place, as I don't believe in pop pseudo science. However, if you wanna be alive, you have to find a way to deal with difficulties. Try to find things that will make you feel better, whatever they are. And start focusing on what you do have rather than what you don't have. I know it's easy to say and hard to do, but it's all you can do.

[teabee]

I'm sorry you're having a rough time of it dancingcolors. Even though a relationship isn't coming fast enough for your liking, it is on it's way and it can't stay away forever. This situation is temporary! Take comfort in that at least.

 

It may feel like this external situation is causing you unhappiness, but don't let it take so much of your power. You still have the ability to feel good even when you're not getting what you want. So try to focus on what you're grateful for and start feeling better rather than focusing on what you're unhappy with, which can only make you feel worse. You will only get what you want when you stop feeling so bad that you don't have it. And if you don't believe that, it's still worth it to focus on something that makes you feel good instead of bad, because wouldn't you rather feel good and feel that way NOW instead of waiting until a relationship comes along to make you feel good?

 

Plus, what kind of partner can you be ready for while you're feeling desperate like this? I doubt you can meet and click with the man of your dreams. You are much more likely to meet another person who is lonely and desperate. So that's another reason to try and start making yourself feel good about where you're at.

 

It's ever so much more satisfying to get into a blissful place and attract a blissful person and live blissfully hereafter than to be in a negative place and attract a negative partner and then try to get happy from that negative place.

 

I'm not really sure if, when you post, you are looking for advice or just sympathy, but I do hope you consider what I'm saying and try it out. Best of luck with everything.

[dancingcolors]

I think I am just venting, to let off some steam, because I feel like a pressure cooker.

[adequate]

Hi dancingcolors. I am 46 and my ex husband left me 4.5 years ago and I have not had sex for 5.5 years now and have not dated anyone since my ex. So I know how you feel and then some! I really don't have the answer but all we can do is hang in there and try to support one another through these tough times. That is what this site is all about and I am grateful for it. Hang in there and PM me if you want to talk.