incestation

[dpressedone89]

hey all, i have a bit of an incestation in my family.my dads gf's daughter is hitting on me she's 11 or 12 or something like that and she tried to give me a lap dance and tried to kiss me. i dont like it but my dad doesnt care and niether does his gf they think its cute.first of all we are almost family second of all she's too young to be doing this third of all i have no idea what to do? any advice apprieciated?ive tried everything logical like tellin her and telling our parents but she still does it any advice at all would be much help. later

-stitches

[wing wha]

hey man i would feel pretty bad in your spot but i think i can help. Well your dad should understand how kind of serious this is. a kiss on the lips at 11 and i guess your 14 15 maybe 16 its really not right more inf o would help. does she understand what that really means. OR is she just see what she sees on tv or mov. i would tell your almost sister to stop. i mean not only is she a pre teen but she is a relative. thats something that could really scare you in the future. i would definitely talk to your almost sister before your parents. because even if your parents tell her to stop and she dose. she will still be thinking it in her mind. So go to her first and ask her this. "her name what is a kiss". If she dosent respond with anything of any sense then she is just a little kid. if she dosent say anything she will soon stop becasue she is embarrased. and if she aswers the question well then go to your parents. i have a weird little sister not that weird but same it will work. look for the three different reactions. ok tell me what happens i need more info on you too

[Gilgamesh]

Hello!

 

Just try as much you can to avoid her, eventually she should get the drift. she may just be trying to draw attention from her mother, (or get back at her by doing what she is doing).

 

Anyway, try talking to her, tell her its wrong, and that she is way too young. in her eyes, your not her brother, just a stranger she is living with.

 

I would try and keep my distance from her as much as possible, also, I wouldnt want to be alone in the house with her, if she comes on to you and you reject, she may try and get even with you, you know what im talking about. Hopefully, it will never get that bad, and she is only having a little crush brought on for her need to draw her moms attn away from your dad.

[Eh Im Canadian]

Well, I don't think you can avoid her, that would probably be difficult. The good news is, it isn't incest! The bad news is it could become incest, assuming your dad and his girlfriend ever...... well, you know. The problem is there is no easy answer to it. You could just tell her to stop, then she would ignore you and do it anyway. So that won't work. You could introduce her to a girl, then break her heart, and make her hate you. Aha, I found an idea. Find a buy for her. introduce her to someone, maybe she'll take her attention off you? Hey, it is worth a shot, and it is one of the only options that I can see. Good Luck.

[dpressedone89]

ok uhm...ive talked to her a few times she says she'll stop but then she just comes on stronger. i told our parents they think it is so cute and they arent gonna stop it. more advice please

-stitches

[QTpie87]

i don't think its a good idea to intro. her to another dude, cause who knows if they will take what she is offering...and she is way to young to be doing that stuff, and trust me she will most likely do it with that guy if she will do it with her almost bro.

[wing wha]

read the first one it s the best

[jessijess]

There are really only 2 options. Keep telling her to stop it until she finally gets the hint or to avoid her. have you tried telling her to stop & then if she doesn't just walking away?

Good luck with every thing

[Eh Im Canadian]

Well, I know my advice wasn't the best, but do you really have much of an alternative? While I'm not saying it is good for her to be doing what she is doing, wouldn't it be good if she were doing it to a guy who actually would want to be in a relationship with her? I mean, it's not like he can avoid her, and he can't get her pissed off at him, because then his dad would get angry. Plus, how would it seem if a 12 year old started crying and said it was because he was being mean to her? It is basically a no-win situation. Hey, maybe you could introduce her to some of your friends, I'll bet that would really embarrass her / you. But if you can convince her that someone is your girlfriend, then she might start sulking and stop trying to, well, do stuff to you, for lack of a better word. Or you could do something pretty funny, that would embarrass the hell out of you. Give her the "Let's just be friends" speech! And if you did it with your dad and his girlfirend, they would probably start laughing, but she also might stop. Good Luck, Hope you find what you are looking for.

[HaHaHa47]

ok well first who eva wrote this is right she doesnt see u as her brother but as a stranger but the more u ignore her the more she will want you. i know this coz the same happened with me and my dads gfs son except i had a huge crush on him i never really saw him as a brother and when he found out he started to ignore me which drived me crazy and made me want him more the only way this whole thing end was time, it took me awhile but i realised that he acts like my brother he tells every1 im like a sister to him so he is a brother to me not sum guy and i moved on and it was heaps hard coz i ended up liking him for a year or 2 but i didnt realise that it was wrong and uncomfortable for him. so maybe if u try more brotherly things with her or like sum1 else said get a gf or a close friend to pretend shes ur gf and show her off in front of her and maybe she'll get it.

[Rahll]

Eh, I say go with it, but I dont think anyone else will like that answer.

[charity66]

I think that you should find someone you trust outside of the family, like a person at church, or a school counselor, an adult friend of your parents that you have known for a while...tell someone outside of the family how this is making you feel and ask them to talk with your dad. Tell your dad yourself that you do not like it and you don't think it is cute and if he doesn't stop it you will tell someone who will. Either way, you shouldn't have to have anyone make you feel uncomfortable in any way in your own home.

I hope this helps in some small way. Sometimes life just stinks and you feel trapped but there is always some way to fix most things. Keep your chin up!

[Mun]

Hi there,

Does this girl have a father? or a grandfather? Find them and tell either one what is going on. Let them have a talk with her and her mother about this.

 

It's very irresponsible of both parents to let this go on. This situation could turn very bad and I'm afraid you would be the one caught in a bad spot. Stop it before it gets to that point. Good luck

[Francis]

You are in a rather difficult situation and, as time goes by, things could get out of control.

 

I have an adult friend to whom such a situation happened : he went to live with his uncle and his younger cousin started hitting on him. He did not say anything because he did not feel confortable to do so.

 

Eventually, when the years passed, she started going into his room and bed at night. He did not dare say anything again because he did not want to upset the family.

 

Eventually, they had some sexual contact, I think they had sex, even though he never actually told me so. She was underage for sex with consent, 13 yrs or 14 yrs old, I believe (having sex with children who are under a certain age is rape, even if the child has initiated and consented etc) . She was totally into him, etc...

 

He left for college and she went into a depression. She ended up telling the whole story to the whole family, her therapist, etc...

 

Now, they all hate him and call him a rapist. He is constantly scared they will file legal action against him. They blame him for all her problems. He is the scapegoat for all her shortcomings now and he lives in terror that he be charged with rape any time and that his career, marriage and happiness will be jeopardized by this.

 

I agree with Charity66 that you should talk about your situation with other adults that might help you (school counsellor for sure, priest too, your own mother if you trust her) and with Muneca that the adults in your family are fairly irresponsible.

 

Things could get out of control and you will be blamed. At least, if you tell other adults, then you will be protected against any legal action if you ever fall into the trap of accepting her advances in the future. Your feelings might change when she becomes a teenager. This is what happened to my friend.

 

Hope this helped. Take care!

[avman]

At least, if you tell other adults, then you will be protected against any legal action if you ever fall into the trap of accepting her advances in the future.

No, this is not true. Simply telling people about it in advance does not protect you if you actually have sexual contact with someone underage. You are in just as much trouble with the law no matter who you've told.

 

I agree with everyone telling you to let an adult know what is going on. But then STAY AWAY from her.

[Jennyve21]

it seems the poor girl has been either been sexually abused or witnessed things she shouldnt have at that age. personally if it were me id get so annoyed id probably slap her little face. no offence. mabye thats why i should breed lol.