MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 If you were dumped over religion how would you move on or try to? I'm a little mad and also sad. Link to comment
pumpkinmoon Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Something like that could help you move on more quickly because you know that it just wouldn't have worked. I have been shocked to see so many people break up over this on ENA. It's sad, it really is. Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Yea you would think so cause I mean it's not my fault I didn't do anything wrong. I have no idea why I feel so down And I feel like he is never going to ask me back because he sort of said it's something he has to do and I don't think I would want to get back with someone he has turned into no offence to religious people but some are too extreme Link to comment
anu1560 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 If you were dumped over religion how would you move on or try to? I'm a little mad and also sad. Getting dumped over religion is very common in many parts of the world especially South Asia. Not that I believe it as a great excuse. If you always knew religion would be big factor then why not choose someone from the same religion. Why lead a person for long time and then give the excuse 'oh my religion will not allow me to be with you'. Thats just a lame excuse. For me atleast. So move on. There is nothing you can really do. Link to comment
luminousone Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Just know that you cannot change someone's convictions... Be thankful that he is being honest with you, rather than trying to convert you or change who you are. Honor your grief -- and then concentrate on meeting new people, and hopefully ones who understand that unconditional love means that your faith does not matter! My cousin married someone of another faith over 30 years ago -- and they are each active in their own congregations (church and synagogue). Their faith communities have studied together to find common ground, and they focus on goodness and similarities rather than on judgment and differences. In time, you will heal... Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Yeah seems like a bit of a selfish act because few years ago when he started getting into his religion more I asked if he wants to break up because I felt like it might be an issue and he said it wouldn't so yeah in a way very selfish Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Just know that you cannot change someone's convictions... Be thankful that he is being honest with you, rather than trying to convert you or change who you are. Honor your grief -- and then concentrate on meeting new people, and hopefully ones who understand that unconditional love means that your faith does not matter! My cousin married someone of another faith over 30 years ago -- and they are each active in their own congregations (church and synagogue). Their faith communities have studied together to find common ground, and they focus on goodness and similarities rather than on judgment and differences. In time, you will heal... He said the only way he could marry me was if I was Christian and wanted some sort of guarantee that maybe it would happen in future because I said I didn't know if it could happen one day or not but I couldn't do that give him that guarantee so I accepted the break up rather then try and force myself to be someone I am not. Link to comment
anu1560 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Brokennn get yourself together. You deserve someone better. There is no point in thinking about why this guy gave a excuse after years of leading you. Since you will never find the reason. Yes. I find it selfish. And I have seen these kind of stuff so much that I find giving excuse of religion/caste/parents/culture as lame/bs excuse and want to use really bad words for these kind of people but don't want to. Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Brokennn get yourself together. You deserve someone better. There is no point in thinking about why this guy gave a excuse after years of leading you. Since you will never find the reason. Yes. I find it selfish. And I have seen these kind of stuff so much that I find giving excuse of religion/caste/parents/culture as lame/bs excuse and want to use really bad words for these kind of people but don't want to. Thank you I believe I deserve better. Link to comment
anu1560 Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 And if he cannot respect your religion, he can never respect you. Today it is religion. Some day he will say, lets do threesome or we breakup. Or why don't you wear that or we break up. You deserve better. Tell that to yourself 100 times. Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Yeah he seems to put his friends in church before anyone. Link to comment
Onegirl Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 He said the only way he could marry me was if I was Christian and wanted some sort of guarantee that maybe it would happen in future because I said I didn't know if it could happen one day or not but I couldn't do that give him that guarantee so I accepted the break up rather then try and force myself to be someone I am not. I am so sorry that happened to you. But its better than having religion crammed down your throat everyday. And I am a christian. But my advice would be to go no contact. Work on yourself. The feelings will pass and they are normal. I learned its okay to be sad, its okay to be angry. It's all part of the process. Link to comment
Onegirl Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 My ex left me because he thinks God told him to. God told him to marry a woman with a history of hurting him and treats him like crap. And I totally agree that religion is an excuse. Link to comment
Darkknight Posted June 21, 2010 Share Posted June 21, 2010 Using religion as an excuse is as bad as just finding something wrong with somebody for the sake of it. I've experienced that before but the last time I checked, religion doesn't necessarily make somebody a better person than someone else. You deserve somebody much better, and more open minded than somebody who fears God and uses it to justify doing whatever they feel like. (Not saying all religious folk do that...I am a Christian) Link to comment
MsDexter Posted June 21, 2010 Author Share Posted June 21, 2010 Yeah, he said God told him to and it's something he needs to do. I think he genuinely believes God wanted him to this which sort of freaks me out LOL. Because I think I have only realised since we broke up how extreme he was starting to be, I mean during the relationship he stopped listening to like music if it's not gospel then he wouldn't listen to it at all. He started attending these get togethers with his church friends and two of them are his cousins (and they are married they are not cousins but they are both his cousins one from mum's side one from dad's - the girl became Christian to be able to sing in church LOL and the guy did to marry her and now they are totally extreme) they never liked me from the day they found out he is with me. You should just see the things they put on their Facebook (I have deleted all of them including him and his number so no contact it is but when I used to have them they could never update a normal status it's always Bible quotes. And he wants to be that way to him that's how you should show your a believer I guess or at least part of it. Link to comment
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