Honeymoon Woes

[Firiel]

My fiance and I are facing a possible time crunch concerning our honeymoon. We are getting married on a Saturday, and a friend of his is getting married the next Saturday. Just for background information, this isn't a best friend of his. It's a friend from school, and while I would love to be able to go to the wedding, I guess I'm kind of bummed about where that leaves us for our honeymoon.

 

We aren't planning anything extravagant. The plan was to drive south and hit a couple of spots for a couple of days each and then drive back up. But this fellow's wedding is eight hours in the exact opposite direction from our tentative honeymoon. So that leaves us with about five days to vacation before we need to be back at the starting point and heading north for the wedding. I really want our honeymoon to be relaxing and I can't see us fitting in all we want to do into these five days without losing the relaxation factor. So that leaves us significantly chopping up our honeymoon.

 

I guess this bothers me for a couple of reasons. The first is that he mentioned before that the reason he wants to go up for this wedding is less because he cares about the wedding and more because he wants to see some friends of his that live there. The second is that he told me at one point that the wedding wasn't that important to him and that I didn't have to bother about planning the honeymoon around it. A month or two later, I was talking to him about plans and he said, "Don't forget we need to be up in *** by Friday for R's wedding." We are going to be really poor, so I feel like this is the only trip we're ever going to be able to take together. The trip I had planned wasn't expensive. I guess I'm just bummed that even my modest expectations for a honeymoon are going to fall apart. No one can win here. I don't really know what my question is, but I guess I'd like some advice on how to navigate this situation where no one can really be happy in the end.

[annie24]

oh, i am sorry. are there other 'romantic spots' in that area near the friend's weeding? can you come up with another itinerary that might be just as fun, and in that area? maybe go south for your 1 year anniversary?

[Zeitgeist]

Does the honeymoon have to be right after the wedding? Is there any reason you couldn't postpone it a couple of weeks or even a few months and wait for the timing to be better?

[annie24]

Does the honeymoon have to be right after the wedding? Is there any reason you couldn't postpone it a couple of weeks or even a few months and wait for the timing to be better?

 

that's a good suggestion too....

[Firiel]

Annie, that's a good idea. His friend's wedding is in a pretty central location, and there are bound to be fun things to do up there. I'd have to bid farewell to the warmth and to a certain tourist attraction that I really want to see, but there won't be any shortage of romantic getaway spots where he friend's wedding is.

 

Sadly, we can't really postpone the honeymoon. We're pretty booked in the weeks after our wedding and before school starts.

[hers]

I recommend using the friend's wedding as a honeymoon also. You'll find something to do and as long as you're together, you should be fine!

 

Other than that, don't get sad that you won't have a real "honeymoon". You have your whole life together for trips. You'll have many more and you can call every single one of them a honeymoon

[IntotheWild]

I recommend trying to convince your fiancee that trying to rush to another wedding after your honeymoon is a stupid idea. Seriously, you're about to be married to this guy so don't be afraid of a little confrontation...don't hold back.

[Sunny1607307996]

Well, did this friends go to your wedding? If not (I think it's always nice to reciprocate if they came to yours) you can skip the wedding and ask try to get together with the other couple for a "married night". You can look at each others wedding pictures and things. Or if your husband just wants to see friends, maybe you can make it just for part of the reception and have less of a time crunch?

 

Going to tourist attractions around the other wedding is a good idea too. You can always go to your original vacation spot for your one-year anniversary.

 

Don't worry, where ever you go you'll have a memorable and wonderful honeymoon!

[savagegirl]

Is this guy who is getting married coming to your wedding? Was he invited? If I were you, I would tell him sorry, you guys will be on your honeymoon the day of his wedding. I am sure he would be understanding about it. I know I would!

[annie24]

but it sounds like Firiel's soon to be husband is more interested in seeing old friends at the reception instead of going to the wedding for this guy.

[IntotheWild]

but it sounds like Firiel's soon to be husband is more interested in seeing old friends at the reception instead of going to the wedding for this guy.

 

Yeah... I guess that's better than wanting to cut the honeymoon short to see a football game or something

[Firiel]

I talked to my fiance about this a bit last night. He basically said that over the last few months he's come to care more about going to this friend's wedding, which is understandable. And if one of my friends was getting married, there is a good chance I would want to attend that wedding even if it was a week after my own. Ah, I'm still disappointed, but I'll get over it.

[Sunny1607307996]

Ah, I'm still disappointed, but I'll get over it.

 

You have a quite a head on your shoulders. I believe your are in for a loving, quality marriage.

[annie24]

You have a quite a head on your shoulders. I believe your are in for a loving, quality marriage.

 

agreed.

[anggrace]

The original plan was to hit a couple of spots for a couple of days each, right? How much time are you losing by having to drive to the wedding after day five?

 

I wouldn't let your "expectations fall apart" because of this. Perhaps just narrow down your plans a little and go to the wedding as well. Enjoy your time together