Lost my virginity, but wish I hadn't.

[Panther_Dude]

I'm not gonna get into all the details on here. But I hooked up with a older woman off of Craiglist and afterwards felt terrible. She wasn't my type and...I was just lonely and the pressure of being a virgin got to me. So basically, male virgins out there. Wait...be strong and don't hook up.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Sorry you felt so much pressure to get it over with. Despite the bragging of lots of men and women who have done it with just anyone to get it over with, I am sure that many actually felt the same way as you afterwards but didn't want to admit it.

[digger11]

don't feel too bad! it's just sex. I understand that you wish you had waited for someone you had more of a connection with, but it doesn't always have to be like that. Now you know your expectations!

[GoneCrazy]

I'm seriously thinking of going to hooker well an escort little more classy and legall.

[getbiii]

from craigslist ??

they have that on craigslist?

[Citlali]

Craigslist is a cesspool. They have anything sexually imaginable--including STIs. Even though you regret it, at least you know that sort of empty sexual contact isn't for you. I would suggest to anyone else thinking about it...to really THINK about it and take shared experiences like these to heart.

[Panther_Dude]

from craigslist ??

they have that on craigslist?

 

Yes, hook up ad's and what not.

[getbiii]

im shocked! i always buy things from craigslist and i haven't seen anything weird althoug i've heard strange stories about craigslist,

like the craigslist killer,

and i saw on the news once something like some guy that posted on craigslist that he would pay someone to go rape his wife, and some dude actually showed up but wasn't able to get into the house

[Panther_Dude]

im shocked! i always buy things from craigslist and i haven't seen anything weird althoug i've heard strange stories about craigslist,

like the craigslist killer,

and i saw on the news once something like some guy that posted on craigslist that he would pay someone to go rape his wife, and some dude actually showed up but wasn't able to get into the house

 

Well, it's on the main page. Under Personals.

 

What do you mean by a cesspool, JennBarr?

[getbiii]

may i ask why it is you feel the way you feel?

did you like it while having it then felt bad/guilty after?

[Panther_Dude]

may i ask why it is you feel the way you feel?

did you like it while having it then felt bad/guilty after?

 

I wasn't attracted to her.....there's more, and you can probably guess it, but I ain't saying.

[getbiii]

no well im saying this because first times usually suck, and for obvious reasons!

because you are un expierenced.

not only this but just like you, everyone has this big pressure of sex,

about being made fun of and being worried your not good enough and be laughed at!

also in my first time case!

i was let down a lot, i kept hearing my friends say sex and sex and sex, its so great wonderful had it all the time blah blah blah

so i did it, got laid,

and my hopes crashed down!!!!

i was expecting to feel this incredible miraculous sensation, because everyone hypes it up.

and what do you know it wasn't that differen than masturbating!

lol

years later i found out that my friends were lying and most of them were still virgens at the time,

 

 

so don't think all sex is gonna be bad but it shouldn't be pushed!

 

its like sports!

when you first play you suck and think you always will but with time.. you start getting better and start liking it more.

 

i also find it more enjoyable when you struggle for it, when you get with the girl that you've been wanting to for a while!

its like money, when you work for it, it feels much better when you spend it and value it more but if you just get it for free you don't care for it that much and let it go down the drain

[Sparkly Eyes]

no well im saying this because first times usually suck, and for obvious reasons!

because you are un expierenced.

not only this but just like you, everyone has this big pressure of sex,

about being made fun of and being worried your not good enough and be laughed at!

also in my first time case!

i was let down a lot, i kept hearing my friends say sex and sex and sex, its so great wonderful had it all the time blah blah blah

so i did it, got laid,

and my hopes crashed down!!!!

i was expecting to feel this incredible miraculous sensation, because everyone hypes it up.

and what do you know it wasn't that differen than masturbating!

lol

years later i found out that my friends were lying and most of them were still virgens at the time,

 

This is hilarious! I know guys who did that. One guy later became my friend's boyfriend and turned out he was a virgin. He made it seem like he was with a new girl every night.

 

OP, it sucks that you thought you had to do this. No sex in my opinion is better than sex with someone you are not attracted to. Live and learn, right?

[Panther_Dude]

I can't take it. She wasn't single. Ok. I'm a bad person, and I won't ever quit my smokes or spitless dip or cigars.

[getbiii]

lol i know! some of them still are!!!

the worst part is that they never admitted to it, i just realized it over time...

those lies about those girls they had been with were later forgoten and changed their stories,

like one friend i thought lost his virginity when we were 14!!!

now that we are older he told me one day he lost his virginity to his ex, which he started dating at 18

[getbiii]

I can't take it. She wasn't single. Ok. I'm a bad person, and I won't ever quit my smokes or spitless dip or cigars.

 

ok, but does that mean you wouldn't like to at all anymore?

 

i mean hey look at the positive side, now you don't have to wonder what all the fuzz was about!

you did it, and now don't have to listen to others lies.

you have your own opinion on it now!

[Panther_Dude]

ok, but does that mean you wouldn't like to at all anymore?

 

i mean hey look at the positive side, now you don't have to wonder what all the fuzz was about!

you did it, and now don't have to listen to others lies.

you have your own opinion on it now!

 

Wouldn't what? I don't smoke everyday or do the dip everyday. I live at home still.

 

I don't like this positive side. I still think about it and I want the images out. Ok...she wasn't single. Her kid was in the next room on the laptop. I'm a terrible person.

[Lamour detruit]

Wouldn't what? I don't smoke everyday or do the dip everyday. I live at home still.

 

I don't like this positive side. I still think about it and I want the images out. Ok...she wasn't single. Her kid was in the next room on the laptop. I'm a terrible person.

 

You're going to hell, my friend..no way around it......

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I kid. You made a mistake, take the experience, and never repeat the same mistake ever again. Don't beat yourself up over it too much, just..realize it is not the way to go. Best thing you can do is just mingle with people your age until you find someone you're truly physically attracted to rather than going for a random lay on craigslist.

[jettison]

I am lucky in that my first time was about as bad ass as it can get... and I've been addicted ever since! ;-)

 

I lost mine on a boat. A motherflippin' boat. I met her in international waters at a discotheque, asked if she wanted to go outside and talk (it was loud in there), and we spent a glorious week together in my cabin. After the second night, she said, "Can you believe that there are guys out there that are still virgins?! Unbelievable!" I didn't have the courage or heart at that age to tell her that I was a virgin as well.

 

The quarters on a cruise ship are small, and one night my friend was in there with her friend, and we were going at it anyway. She was screaming so loud that my friends were applauding. I should have been embarrased perhaps, but I was young, stupid, a little drunk, and it was like nectar from the Gods. I was just ravishing this poor girl. "If I was a tidal wave then I'd ravish your coast, there would be no survivors.

 

Over the next three nights, we received three separate complaints about loud sex from neighbor cabins, and I whole-heartedly admit, I was smug, cocky, and loving every minute of it. About day 4 she told me that she knew that she was in love with me. I said, "In love? This is just lust baby!" OMG I was such an arrogant young tool at that moment.

 

I look back and laugh at all that, but it's hard to believe that someone could have a better first experience outside of "falling in love with your long term girlfriend" type of thing. That didn't happen to me for real until many years later. Of course, it was 1000 times better, but I'll never forget my first.

 

Hello? Michelle Silver? Are you out there? What a fox too.

[IntotheWild]

The worst thing about this kind of mistake isn't the mistake itself. Don't let guilt/shame overtake you because that will lead to an avalanche of future mistakes, all of which will reinforce each other to create an endless destructive cycle.

 

The most important thing to do now is not let this experience bring you down. If you're concerned about future love interests, just remember to be honest and humble. The right girl will have a heart of compassion and she won't judge you, provided you start walking the good path from now on.

[waveseer]

Sounds like a valuable growing up experience to me. Put it in your journal for future reference and move on to better things. Our mistakes teach us who we really are.

[jettison]

The worst thing about this kind of mistake isn't the mistake itself. Don't let guilt/shame overtake you because that will lead to an avalanche of future mistakes, all of which will reinforce each other to create an endless destructive cycle.

 

The most important thing to do now is not let this experience bring you down. If you're concerned about future love interests, just remember to be honest and humble. The right girl will have a heart of compassion and she won't judge you, provided you start walking the good path from now on.

 

Or, we can just realize that who we're fornicating with, and why we're doing it, and what we think about it, and what they think about it, in the grand scheme of things, is one of the most trivial things in the world. How self-agrandized do we have to be as human beings to believe that our petty sexual longings amount to anything at all? Wars? Starvation? Hunger in the street? Genocide? And somehow taking your clothes off and engaging in some naked rubbing with someone is important? It's NOT! The Universe (god, whatever) isn't watching. He isn't judging you. He has more important things to do then spend all of his/her time fretting over whether you got that position right, or whether you are "good enough", or she is "good enough", or he is "good enough". God is more benevolent then that, and certainly has a sense of humor. If he doesn't, then how do you explain jumbo shrimp, or fresh frozen food?

[IntotheWild]

Jettison: my post was made in hopes that the OP wouldn't be consumed with guilt. For some people, a negative sexual experience, especially the first time, can be a painful and long-lasting memory.

 

Do you care about the OP at all? I read your posts often. You write well, but you're self-consumed. This thread is suppose to be about helping the OP, not bragging about how you shagged some girl on a boat, how amazing you performed, and how the OP should mirror your fine life example.

[enalover143]

If I recall, many people on ENA have advised you and countless others in your situation that simply discarding your virginity is NOT going to make you feel all that much better. I am sorry you feel this way but you can only put it in the past and move on and work on yourself and your self-esteem. Sucks that we have to say we told you so Good luck.

[stormie]

ugh, for future references, people who advertise sex on craigslist is usually bottom-of-the-barrel.