I think I have a concubine!

[JoeK_19]

(FYI -- Long post ahead, I apologize in advance)

Wasn't sure where to post this, so this section seems generic enough. I'm also just posting this here since it's a strange situation and I haven't really talked to anyone about it, figured I might get some feedback or provide some folks with some sh**'s and giggles.

 

Backstory...I live in a city where I know hardly anyone outside of work (and none of them are really friends). I moved here 3 years ago and met a gal shortly after, fell in quickly with her and her friends. When things went south with that I realized I put "all my eggs in one basket" and didn't have any social circle outside of her. Fast forward a few months and I decide I'm going to leave this town and go back to school "somewhere else". My lease is up in about a month and a half at which point I'll have a U-Haul trailer filled with as much crap I can fit and saying goodbye to the rest.

 

So last Sunday, I was out walking my dog around 1 am and we encountered a girl walking alone in my development who wanted to say hi to my dog. We chatted a bit and seemed like we might get along and we were local so we exchanged #'s. The next day she sends me a text asking if I want to hang out tonight. She comes over, we have a few adult beverages and she eventually tells me her whole situation.

 

Turns out she's been staying with her aunt & uncle in the building next to mine on and off when she's in town. She can't work because she was in an accident a year ago and she's waiting for the settlement check to pay her medical bills, while receiving disability benefits. She has a daughter that lives with her Mom many many states away. She makes $ as a "no-sex escort" for mostly old rich guys...essentially "playing girlfriend" & arm-candy for as long as they're willing to pay her. Her "home" (father's place) is over an hour away from the city and she doesn't have a car, so she likes to stay as close to the city as possible for the sake of her "clients".

 

It shouldn't take a rocket surgeon to figure out where she was going with the story. She offered fair monetary compensation, decent company, and domestic help with chores and walking the dog. I live a relatively drama free and solitary lifestyle, so I didn't commit to anything at the time. Despite the obvious drama she has going on, I got a good vibe from her and I respected the fact she was completely honest with me. She ended up crashing on my couch that night and went back to her relative's place when I left for work the next morning. We hung out the next night and she ended up staying in my bed...and we boinked like adolescent rabbits. I didn't ask her to leave the next morning when I left for work, and came home to a clean apartment, a happy dog that didn't spend the day in his crate, and dinner on the stove. We talked that night and I told her I was okay with the "arrangement".

 

I was quite happy when I came home that second night, not only to find I wasn't robbed blind, but rather someone cooked me dinner. Granted, I'd be surprised if someone could get more than $2K at a pawn shop for everything I own. I asked her for her ID, took a picture of it, emailed it to a friend and said "if anything happens to me, start here. i'll explain later."

 

I realize this is not a very morally sound situation and I like to think I would have told her NO WAY if I wasn't moving very soon. She's on vacation with a "client" in a very nice place right now (I'm kinda jealous). I know she said that her work relationships are non-sexual, but she obviously knows how to use her femininity and sexuality to win over guys, so I'm not going anywhere near her without Captain Trojan.

 

So for anyone that made it through my whole story, any thoughts or feedback? Did you have a laugh?

[misssmithviii]

Well as long as both of you maintain open communication on what you both expect from each other, and what exactly the status of the relationship is - I see no problem. She is a professional, so I suggest you take nothing to heart really.

 

The problem will start when you start expecting more from her or wanting more, and even this jealousy.

It's odd... but if you think you've taken the necessary precautions for dealing smartly with a concubine in your house with you away - then by all means ^_^

 

That wasn't nearly as sarcastic as it sounded though too.

You are moving soon, so treat this as such.

[yokohama_mama]

I don't really see anything funny about the situation, but you're both consenting adults, so if you're both happy with your "arrangement" why not?

 

If it was me though, I'd feel kind of lame paying someone to play girlfriend, and also I wouldn't be able to trust someone who did this kind of work. I have a hard time believing nothing sexual happens with her other clients. I also wonder why she's not looking after her daughter. Is she an addict of some sort? I don't think I'd feel comfortable giving her free reign in my apartment while I was out. But anyway... good luck. Stay safe.

[digger11]

Yeah just say safe. She is most likely having sex with these men... when a man takes her on vacation it's overnight. i doubt he is paying for both rooms. wear a rubber and enjoy it! she sounds like she has her stuff decently together. If she were going to rob you, should would have done it already. She also wouldn't have been so honest about the situation.

[sidehop]

Ya just be careful. And don't get attached to her.

[waveseer]

Anytime you fall asleep around a stranger who has no problem dating a different man every night for money expect to wake up without your cash, jewelry, credit cards, and car.

[RougeKali823]

Condoms don't protect against everything and I'd be leery of allowing someone I just met in my home alone. So, I would suggest that you exercise a little more caution.

[JoeK_19]

Anytime you fall asleep around a stranger who has no problem dating a different man every night for money expect to wake up without your cash, jewelry, credit cards, and car.

 

Like I said, I'm not at all materialistic, and she could probably make a few bucks of my LCD TV, DVD's, and a few other electronics, but not enough to make it worth it. "cash"--lucky day if I've got $20 in my pocket, "jewelry"--I wear a $20 Fossil watch and shoe-strings on the other wrist, "credit cards"--maxed out...good luck, "car"-- with my Jeep and I'll up your life. I've got a picture of her ID and I know where her Mom works, so if anything happens I won't let her get away without a fight. If the situation does get bad, I probably won't be able to let you guys know because my computer will have been stolen. =)

[waveseer]

Like I said, I'm not at all materialistic, and she could probably make a few bucks of my LCD TV, DVD's, and a few other electronics, but not enough to make it worth it. "cash"--lucky day if I've got $20 in my pocket, "jewelry"--I wear a $20 Fossil watch and shoe-strings on the other wrist, "credit cards"--maxed out...good luck, "car"-- with my Jeep and I'll up your life. I've got a picture of her ID and I know where her Mom works, so if anything happens I won't let her get away without a fight. If the situation does get bad, I probably won't be able to let you guys know because my computer will have been stolen. =)

 

What if she turns up pregnant, or says she is?

[JoeK_19]

What if she turns up pregnant, or says she is?

 

As I stated, I won't be going anywhere near her without being wrapped up. While I know that condoms are not 100% effective, they've worked great for me for 14 years so I'm not too worried. Plus, you can buy paternity tests at the drug store now to avoid going on Maury (the little box at Rite Aid isn't too expensive, but getting the results mailed back to you is [screams out conspiracy theories]). If it does happen and it turns out it's mine, I could easily push her down the stairs and not have to worry about anything (FYI -- please don't flag me here or anything like that for that comment. I have a sick sense of humor...I would never push anyone down a flight of stairs, regardless of whether or not they were carrying my baby).

 

tOoDLes!~

[ay0_x]

Sounds like a pretty win situation ahah.

 

And I don't see why everyone's worried that the OP is going to fall in love with her. Really now, he knows she's sleeping with other men and being their Mrs for money, I don't know how anyone in their sound mind can fall in love with someone like that.

[digger11]

original poster- you are hilarious my friend. love your posts