First time talking to my ex since we took a break, how should it go?

[tripped]

My ex told me she needed time to work things out. She said she still loved me and missed me, but that she had a lot of things going on and that she didnt want to talk until after her midterms were over. Well, its been almost two weeks since we talked, and her midterms are over tomorrow. She tried talking to me a few days after saying that, but I kept it short because I wanted to respect what she said. I am thinking about giving her a call on Friday or Saturday, if she hasnt called me first. My question is, how should this conversation go? Despite my heartbreak that this happened, I am still as in love with her as always. I want to tell her that, but I dont want to scare her off. Should I act like I dont care? Should I let her know how much I miss her? Should I let her do all the talking? Help?

[jony1234]

probly wait till she calls you... but thats just my opinion ... my ex said that to me i waiting for her to do all the contact till i knew she wanted to come back... then i would call sometimes not everyday or anything.. she did come back but only for 5 months then felt the same way again and broke up ....

[DN]

I agree - let her call you.

[jony1234]

it so tough not to call.. but if they want to talk they know your number...thats how i look at it..

[tripped]

You know, that's true in most situations I feel, but in this one I feel like it might be different. See, during the first week I came home, she called/texted me everyday trying to apologize and saying she loved me. But I was so hurt and angry, I told her not to even bother talking to me til she knew 100% what she wanted. I then ignored her for two days. I finally talked to her, and she had gotten angry at my refusal to accept her apology. That's when she said not talking would be good for us.

 

So after that, I feel like she might be waiting for me to tell her how I feel. Every time we have talked, I have been angry and let her know it. I feel like it might be a pride thing for her. What do you guys think? I have even thought about calling her today, but I think that might make her feel like I dont care about her feelings. I dont know.

[DN]

In that case, you had better call her.

[tripped]

Call her now, or after her midterms?

[DN]

After the midterms. And tell her you are sorry you didn't accept her apology but now you have calmed down you would like to talk.

[tripped]

Alright. It should also probably be noted that there was another guy in the picture, part of the reason she wanted to figure things out. When she tried apologizing, she said she didnt want anything to happen with the guy. However, they have classes together, tonight and tomorrow night. So that's the reason I thought about calling today. I dont want her to do anything rash with this guy if she is mad at me, and I definitely dont want her thinking I dont want something with her, and her going to this other guy for comfort. Should this matter?

[DN]

If she chooses him - better to know rather than trying to get in first. If she loves you she won't want him.

[jony1234]

she said she didnt anything to do with the guy.. and if she does not much you can do to cahnge her mind.. she gots to do it on he own... its hard man.... my ex says theres no one shes intersted in.. but you never know...

[tripped]

So last night I got online, and she was on, so I started a small conversation. It went good, we talked for a little bit, but she was working on her midterm so I didnt want to keep her. I never mentioned our relationship until the end, when I told her I would like to call her in a couple of days. She said "it's not like you're forbidden to call me." And then asked if there was something specific I wanted to talk about. I told her I wanted to see where we stand.

 

This confuses me because she actually DID tell me to give her space throughout her exams! Does this support my theory that she is mad that I didnt accept her apology? Has she been waiting for me to call or something?

[nutz76]

Don't get your hopes up. When women say they "need a break" that's usually code for breaking up with you in a non-confrontational, less drama fashion. There's usually another guy they want to try out and don't want to feel guilty/ * * * * ty for testing the waters so they put the bf on hiatus as a get out of jail free card. What happens while you're "on a break" doesn't count as cheating. Mark my words, do NOT contact her. She initiated the break, she has to be the one to end it. Don't bother waiting for her. In fact if you start seeing someone else that's the best way to get them come crawling back when they realized they've lost your attention. That ego hit is immensely powerful.

[bitebenot]

Go NC...somebody else got into the picture but she aint going to tell you that in case it doesnt work out ! Your a doormat or call it a back burner.Ignore her till she crawls back,dont even answer her emails or phone calls.Just listen to the messages from your phone. Ignore her,if she loves you she will be back,then you decide what you want to do !!!! Chase her and shes gone.