I can't seem to get her out of my mind...

[LostWithoutYou]

I don't know what to do to get my mind of my ex g/f. I always wake up around 5 in the morning and can't seem to fall back to sleep...as soon as I opened my eyes, she's all in my head. I don't know what to do? please help...

[amaranth_04]

Get up and do something to get your mind focussed on something else. At that hour, it would be a bit of a challenge to find something to do, esp if you don't live alone. Are you good with computers, web design ? You could try setting up a web page based on one or a few of your hobbies, let's say. In the day time when you find yourself thinking about her, you could go looking for information to fill onto that web page. Then when you wake up thinking of her, just start typing away, scanning in pictures etc. Just anything really to get your mind onto something else, even for a little while. Then when thoughts of her get less obtrusive, you will find it easier to switch off for a while and go back to sleep.

 

It's an ongoing thing. You have to make a conscious decision to get yourself thinking about something else, if only for a little while. Break the monotony up a bit, or you'll find yourself going back to thinking about her again. Find some new things to get your mind engrossed in, it will be easier to deal with the invading thoughts. During calmer times, make a note of what you could do to help ease your mind when you're not as calm.

 

Hope this helps some.

[lisaria]

Hey Lost,

It's always the worst time of the day. You're sleeping, maybe even dreaming of them and then you wake up. You are fine the first few seconds and then BAM!!! You realize that they aren't in your life anymore. God that hurts! At first it feels like somebody has punched you in the stomach and you've lost your breath. That's when i would reach over and grab my pillows and press my face into it and scream in agony. It would be pure pain coming out. But quietly so no one would hear, ya' know? It is pure hell. Then you have to get up and go to work and pretend like you're ok even though it feels like you'll never ever be ok again. I would then cry in the shower, have to put my make-up on twice because the first time my tears would smear everything. (Of course, you guys don't have to worry about that) Then go to work and cry in the bathroom and hope nobody notices your red eyes when you come out. Allergies, I said once or twice even though i don't really have any. You just get through the day. Then you rush home and check your email and phone msgs. hoping and praying that they called or contacted you. They didn't call your work or cell # or email your work address so you KNOW they contacted your home. Nothing. But you got through that day and you'll get through tomorrow too.

I got carried away Lost. Sorry.

To answer your question: I usually wake up really early too. I always have a book by my bed. NOT anything with romance in it though. If it looks like it's going that way, I would just put it down and save it for later. I've been reading self-help books alot. Also getting up and exercising is really, really good. Gets you moving and those chemicals that are released that make you feel good will help you alot.

I don't know if any of this helps you, but hang around here and someone will give advice that will help.

Lisa

[FreeAgain]

Lost, I ve been through the same thing when my first 'love' left me. How long has it been for you?

 

Didnt matter what time i went to bed, but i was up before the sun everyday for the first couple of weeks. Must have had 4-6 hours per night during that period. But it did get alot better, it just took a bit of time for the healing process to get me back to being me. And when i was ready to move on, i found someone even better than i could image. Well... that one didnt work out either, but im a bit more expeinced with it, so (as bad as it is) its not as bad this time

 

They say the time it take to heal is based on how long you were together, but their are many things you can do to help it along. amaranth, said it best.... get up and do something. Walk, run, ride, lift ... doing something healthy, it'll help distract some of the sadness and get you feeling better about yourself. And anything else you can find thats constructive or educational or something. Ive been doing all kind of stuff lately to keep my mind off, but i still find myself getting bored and thinking back. I just trying to find something else to do.

 

Im not saying you should forget all together. You do need times to think and get your emotions out. Its not healthy to bottle it all up. Even though theirs alot of sad feelings, try to pull some posatives out of it. Everything we go through is a learning experience for the future. Note the things that were wrong (and right) with the relatioship so you'll be better prepaired for future ones. Life is always throughing curve balls at us, its how we handle them that determins the person we are and will become.

 

Hope this helps a bit