Leighton Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Does NC get harder as time goes by? For me it's been 4 days, which has been the longest I've EVER gone so I'm proud to say the least lol, and I have no intention of contacting him but I feel as though yesterday and today have been really hard, and I just feel like it's gonna get worse and I'll give in to talking to him. I find myself checking my phone a lot because I'm not gonna lie.. I do want to hear from him. But on the flip side, though I'm lonely, not talking to him has made me less stressed and stronger... so I know that breaking it will make me feel worse.. hence why I won't! Link to comment
CuZiNeeDYoU Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 For me it got harder after 30 days for some reason. I dont wanna discourage you but it will get harder...then easier...then it gets harder again lol its quite a ride stay strong! Link to comment
jimmajam Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 From my experience... THe first week or two were hard. Then it got easy. After you hit that month mark it gets hard just because you start to realize what it all means. After that I'd say it gets easy again...but you will run into a few more weak periods where you feel sad and want to break it. It's a roller coaster, but it's easier to control after you get over that first month or so. Link to comment
newinvention Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 I'm on day 22 and can say that the only thing that I find hard is that fact that my ex has not tried once... Oh, well. I think if you know in your heart that it's their place to call, it makes it easy to not contact. Link to comment
Boughs Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 I spent 6 months of agony getting over my first love. Its really hard once the 3rd week hits, then eases up. Then about 2 months later it comes back around... That 2 month mark is very difficult because you delude yourself into thinking everything is ok. But at that point, you need to remain the way you've been. Its hard, but long showers and great music help. Link to comment
luckyman Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 The first week or two were the hardest after that i gradually gets easier especially if you keep busy, hanging with friends, gym, ect. Link to comment
Mustachio Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Everyone has said it already. Its hard, very very hard for the first few weeks. Then it gets easier. Then depending on you and the situation it may get harder again, it may not. From my experience, it needs to be done, for a while, then you can make a much more objective decision if you want to break it or not. Link to comment
pacopaco Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 From my experience... THe first week or two were hard. Then it got easy. After you hit that month mark it gets hard just because you start to realize what it all means. After that I'd say it gets easy again...but you will run into a few more weak periods where you feel sad and want to break it. It's a roller coaster, but it's easier to control after you get over that first month or so. agreed. It's a ride. I'd say for the first couple of months it's an absolute rollercoaster with good days and bad ones. days where you feel empowered and then days when you just feel like dialing or emailing or going over or whatever, maybe trying to find an excuse for doing so. this will happen until your heart and brain settle into what it really means. when your heart and brain are on the same page (because the heart wants what the heart wants) then it's an explosion of emotion. It's quick but not painless. I had a long cry and when I was over crying, it was over. Link to comment
Raoul Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 It is a rollercoaster. But each down, then up, gets easier on you. This is why No Contact (NC) works. Its for you to move on. Stay with it. It is worth it. Its the quickest way to recover. Do you pull band-aids of slowly or quickly? For me, the short, sharp pain is preferable to a slow, drawn out one with all its doubts and forebodin, . Get it over with. Stay with it. You will heal more quickly. You give him the gift of missing you. Peace & strength, Raoul Link to comment
Spondence Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Yeah, don't wanna burst the buble here but for me it has basically sucked since day one almost 3 months ago. I can play all kinds of games with myself but in reality I miss her and that's that. Sure it might not be so bad a year from now, just need a year to go by that's all. Link to comment
OptomisticGirl Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 I went 20 days without calling him. He called twice and I picked up so it wasn't strict NC but I didn't call and that was a huge goal for me. The first few days were rough and then after the first few weeks it got harder. It comes in waves really. You just have to stick with it and realize you are ALLOWEED to have bad days. It's part of the healing process. When I went through those hard times I beat myself up because I thought I should already be over him after 2 months of being broken up.. but you can't beat yourself up. Realize you will have bad days, let the days ride out, and the good ones will follow. Link to comment
dhor Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Day 50 right here and it feels like I'm going all the way back to the first week because of the holidays. I feel like I should get a rebound or something to keep me busy this Christams. Link to comment
tina-rocks Posted December 20, 2009 Share Posted December 20, 2009 Trying not to dwell on the time scale will help even though I know it's almost impossible not to keep track of the days. Keep busy and be with those who love you, including getting out with friends. Anything that helps with the pain. you will have your good days and bad during NC, but as the days pass it will lesson I promise you that. I am here if you need someone to talk to. Hugs christina x Link to comment
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