Want to shock your ex? Try this!

[guineapig1607306442]

Those of you that know my story, know that after the break-up of my relationship I did everything that everybody else usually does.

 

Firstly I pleaded with my ex to take me back, told her I loved her etc.

Then she met someone else, so I cut off contact…..she kept emailing though.

I then asked her if she was 100% positive that this is what she wanted? She said "Yes"

 

She was playing games BIG time. She'd tell me that she missed talking to me, that she loved me with all of her heart (as a friend lol) and that I was a great guy/boyfriend…..but that she didn't want to be with me.

 

The breaking point came last week when she said (and I quote). "I know that you're hurting really badly at the moment, but I know that you'll meet someone that is going to treat you like you deserve to be treated"

 

Well, needless to say I saw RED. Here I was receiving pity from this woman!! I just could not believe how little respect she has for me – firstly to play the "Push away, pull close, push away again" game….and then to give me pity because she thinks that I am having trouble moving on. Especially when my inability to move on is directly related to her mixed signals (ie Actions vs Words).

 

So, my friends, I have done something that has shocked the hell out of her…I stopped arguing, stopped telling her how I thought we were meant to be and I did something extremely radical…..I agreed with her!

 

I emailed her that after having some time to think, I had decided that breaking up was indeed the right thing to do. I told her that we were better friends than lovers (something that she has said) and that the spark had gone towards the end of the relationship (another thing that she said).

I went on to say that at the time of the relationship ending I was actually relieved (that is true BTW) and that after losing sight of that for a few months, my relief has returned.

 

In effect, I have made it a 'mutual break-up'….and you know what?......She doesn't like it one bit!! She emailed back saying that she sometimes still wonders if this is the right thing to do (WTF?) and that she still misses me.

What I have done is given her a bit of rejection – instead of being the guy who has been rejected, I am actually saying that there were some things about her (in the relationship) that I didn't like either…..and it's making her as insecure as hell.

 

She is now questioning her confidence, she is now worried about the loss of power that she used to have over me……and I am the one who feels in control.

 

Believe me, in the right situation (depending on the break-up), this is gold!

 

I have gone from being pitied by her to now feeling a little bit sorry for her (because of her insecurity). I have the power back and now feel (more than ever) ready to leave her behind…..because it is MY decision as well.

 

Trust me on this – if you want to boost your confidence and put more than a little doubt in your ex's mind…..just agree with them, simple but effective.

[jujigatame]

Ooh, you so bad!

 

Normally I'm against revenge, but you pulled it off in a way that I find smooth, almost classy! It's not as if you said something to hurt her... You're right! All you did is agree! I'll have to remember that one!

[TearsofaDragon20]

thats one heck of a move you pulled off to your ex. women hate when they see that they lost the upper hand, because then they know "oh now i dont have power over him." deal. well thats too bad see you screw us guys over you can make damn sure it can come back to you in full force times 10. by either the guy or their own screw ups.

[cookies]

actually,...thats NOTHING new in how he responded to her situation..and was the best way to go about it, to relieve himself of the pain of being hurt after being dumped. This goes for females as well tho. if theres a guy that we digg, and he is just not interested...its BEST to some how grasp the same mentality to be on the same wavelength...

 

you wanna move away from me...im not gonna be foolish and keep showering you with my undivided attention, when clearly your interests are elsewhere...

 

Good suggestions here that apply for BOTH sexes..but u guys just dont go about it as what "females" do and what "females" dont do...id hate to see a topic that can benefit both sexes, turn into a biased post...

 

glad ur doing better...

 

cookies

[Dazed Confused]

*High Five*

 

:splat: It's nice to have a bit of poetic justice but do yourself a favor and don't keep going back and forth. If you were to let her back into your life, she will no doubt do this again the minute you show any sign of weakness.

 

I have always hated the game of "He who cares the least wins" but I guess it's human nature to always want what you can't have...

[bleeder]

Ok, cool it folks. 8)

 

Yes Cookies, this situation can be applied to BOTH SEXES. We have seen so many threads here about Ex's who still wishes to have the upper hand even after a breakup. Gender is of no issue.

 

Bottom line is, let's all open our eyes to what is really happening out there. Do not let others abuse, manipulate or use us in any form.

 

Stand your ground.

[Gilgamesh]

Its good to get some dignity back,. your partner broke up with you, but still wanted to feel "loved" so she was using your attention towards her to help her get over the guilt of breaking up with you,.

 

Its not a gender thing, both sexes do these things to each other, and dont believe its biased against women. its biased against this particular women in this particular post.

 

knowing what i know now over the reasons of my breakup, I wish I had done the same thing, my friends see me as a pathetic whimpering idiot, and it all ended worse than if i would have just told her, "Oh you want to break up, no problem, your loss, please dont expect me to accept you back as I have no trust of you now. bye. I would be in a little better shape right now.

[Marco]

I'm glad this worked for you, but it could have backfired just as well (if you really wanted to get back together). Were you bluffing or did you really mean it?

 

Sounds like its time to move on regardless. Hope you get what you want!

[coolbloke1978]

WOW! Reverse pschology! I love it!

[Mattie]

I can see how it'd work. It happened to me with an ex once. I didn't want her and I called a break. Then, after the break, she didn't want me and I was all over her, begging her, etc... I'd lost "the power".

 

However, I think you can only really do this tactic if you are over the person because it could easily backfire.

 

If I was to do it to the girl I'm after, I don't think it'd make much sense as I want to get back with her.

[sylvia116]

whenever my ex dumps me which is about once a month,i agree with him and the second i show a sign of life ya know.god forbid eat something or go out with a friend he gets all freaked out and starts making time for me.its a GAME and i know that but i am trying to figure out what makes people do that in their minds..