I finally found a real ....

[newlife21]

hi guys, i didn't put this in the title because i don't want it to look like i am advertising. if you read my previous posts, i have a curiosity in psychics. i had called quite a number and had learned to spot fake ones. today, i finally found a real one, my jaw dropped to the floor.

 

she had many testimonies on her websites, people swearing how real she is, many actually visited her in person, not just the phony phone type. that is why i decided to give her a try. and her charge is so reasonable. she didn't ask any questions, just names and asked to me to focus.

 

i prepared a few questions to ask before i called. she answered every one in depth, with accuracy and she doesn't sugar coat. i was so used to sugar coating fake psychics that her answers hurt. now i know better why my bf/ex behaves in certain ways.

 

back to my relationship. so it is now confirmed that my ex/bf is a serious sulker. once he sulks, he treats me like crap. he had intention to marry me, wanted me to see his parents etc. but once he sulks, he can throw everything away. and when he sulks, even if i put in effort to coax him, it will take days for him to recover, and the process would hurt me a lot.

 

right now, he is confused if we should end it or not. is not the first time, is the 6th time i think. everytime he is upset, he will think of giving up. this time, same for me, is not just him. i cringed at the way he sulks, i don't find it mature, which he admitted before and said he would change. obviously he couldn't. he is mid 40s btw.

 

i can save this relationshp if i accommodate him, coax him, again. if he is a woman, i am a man, i have no problem. but i am finding this very difficult, i am finding it extremely difficult to accept a mature professional man to behave like this. however, so far this is his only serious short comings. he is wonderful in all other areas. we are totally compatible all other areas, esp sex.

 

i am in TOTAL LOST. should i save the relationship? should i end it? should i wait for him to save it? psychic said he will contact me in 48 hours. the problem is i had created a problem, i had switched off my handphone for 10 days, it was our style to sms because it is a semi LDR and he is not here. of course, he could appear or email. oh well, i am just finding excuses for myself.

 

i am sorry i am so long winded. i do feel that if i love him enough, i should accommodate him and make it work. i did did this for the past many times, this is the first time i walked away. oh boy, what should i do? if he couldn't change, does it mean he doesn't love me enough?

[Dinka]

I have to admit something: reading your post sounded like two completely different stories. Plot A was a thriller about a psychic and Plot B was a romantic drama about you and your boyfriend. Don't, don't, DON'T try and make these stories the same one.

 

Don't go to this psychic any more. I don't care if she really is genuine - this is your relationship and the worst thing you can do is start asking people to make decisions for you and solve your problems. This is your relationship, these are answers that only YOU can give. Even on ENA, you won't find people giving you specific solutions...just guidelines and questions you need to ask yourself. Don't look for mystical signs like "he'll call you in 48 hours" because you'll end up distracting yourself from the real issue at hand - which is addressing the issues in your relationship.

 

Talk to your BOYFRIEND before you start talking to other people. Approach the situation realistically: is it really going to be about loving each other "enough" in the long run, or is it going to be about loving each other and being compatible.

 

Answer the questions for yourself and don't build up expectations of what should happen. Accept what is best for you in the long run so you can be happy with YOU, and possibly happy with a PARTNER.

[newlife21]

thanks for your reply. i didn't meant to plot my post, i wrote this after talking to that psychic, and she did help to shed light into the issue. i realise there is a problem of compatibility which i didn't know was so serious.

 

right now, i really have no answer for myself. i don't want to initiate communication with him , i really feel like i am begging for him to love me. done this few times, i will start to hate myself to do it again.

 

what i want is so simple, reasonable and logical. he couldn't do it. i think the only explanation is incompatibility. i thought love conqueres all, well, must learn to face reality.