Coming or Going Disorder!!! Can anyone relate?

[bloo4u]

I would just like to know if anyone else has a relationship that confuses them to the verge of insanity?!!! My "partner" (I use the term loosely) plays this stupid little game like we are children...the problem is, we are 24 with 2 kids. You'd think game-time would be left for the kids. Anyway, he will treat me like complete garbage with no warning for no apparent reason when I've been nice and thoughtful, etc. Then when I get fed up with the feeling of having 3 children (when I know I only gave birth to 2) and decide I can't take the immaturity, he plays a Dr.Jekyl and Mr. Hyde act on me and starts being loving, caring, and sincere. I get so confused! I call it the "coming or going disorder". Sometimes I swear by the time I leave I'll have been with so many of his personalities I'll be to worn out to ever date again! AGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

[MrDraw]

Hi Bloo4u,

 

You're young, have children and are in a difficult situation. The "disorder" your boyfriend has is awfull and doesn't contribute to your relationship at all. (at least, that's my opnion).

Have you talked about it with your and his parents?

I think that if you did talk to them, without him present at first, maybe you'll get some advice or some help.

It's very difficult to keep a relationship going if your boyfriend is going up and down, with al those "mood swings".

Just try to talk about it with your parents, ask them for advice.

 

That's the best I can say to you. You just need help from somebody.

I hope everything will work out for you.

 

I wish you all the best.

 

Greetz,

MrDraw

[JN]

Something to think about is… is this some thing you can live with for the rest of your life? No one can make a person changed believe me I tried. My ex-husband was on the emotional roller costars (along with other things that don't fit in here) and it's hard to deal with, after a while I could just role my eyes and repeat every thing he was going to say or do verbatim. Do you see a pattern? Now I am not suggesting what you are going threw is of that. It could be immaturity, a chemical imbalance- Anxiety, Bipolar, and depression to name a few. Maybe just adjusting to a new way of life. Relationship counseling is great! If you have a church you belong to it's often free, and if you don't have insurance there are lots of places that offer low fee-sliding scale. You said there are children, and two years is so much to give up. It's hard starting over. But remember do not stay just for your children, does the good out weigh the bad? Is there any emotional or physical abuse? I know when I complained to family and friends it just made every little fight worse, family and friends are good to have, but not to involve in your relationship.

This is just some of the mistakes of my past. Live and learn, that's all I can say.

"Keep on trudging down that road to happy destiny."

 

[laurag78]

Have u tried talking to him? can you think of anything that may be bothering him? Has he always been like this? I know that in relationships there is almost always a powwer struggle. who has the pants on and who is whipped. I had a similar problem with my husband of 3 years, we also have kids (3), 1 that is his. I felt that I loved him more than he loved me, and so my life revolved around him. Little by little, I stopped obsessing about how good i was to him and how little he did for me. Now, i give what i get. He's in a shitty mood, well so am i. He came to realize that i wasn't going to put up with him giving me the cold shoulder, cause he knew he would get it right back. You have to even out the power. If that doesn't work, than maybe you should look into your options. What i do know is that you don't have to put up with it. It's a waste of life.

 

What doesn't kill you, will only make u stronger