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Why is she doing that? :confused:


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Hi guys! I really need your opinion on this one.


I will try to keep it as short as possible.

I have a boyfriend whom I'm very much in love with. We've been together for 5 years and are very happy.


We have a mutual friend (or so I thought), a girl. Now we lost touch with her and didn't talk for about 2-3 years. This weekend she contacted my boyfriend through one of the social networking websites that we both are on. I was excited because I was curious to hear from her. My boyfriend told me that she asked about me and that he said we lived together and that all the rest is pretty much the same as it was 2 years ago.

Yesterday my boyfriend was on the computer and then I went to check my mail and stuff on the same laptop. I signed in on that website that we are on and for some reason it was his account. I didn't notice that, but I saw I have a new mail (I thought it was mine). The e-mail was from this girl (our mutual friend). She said in it a lot of things but the e-mail focused mostly on me, I was shocked. She said that I'm not the right person for him, that he should break up with me and he shouldn't worry because even though we've been together for a long time it would feel like a breeze of fresh air when he breaks up with me. Also she invited him to visit her (she lives in a different city). She said my boyfriend could bring me along but then they won't be able to catch up properly (?).


I asked my boyfriend about her and he said that she invited us over, but all the rest he left out.


My question to you is, should I tell him I saw the e-mail, or should I not say anything?


It really bothers me, the e-mail made me extremely sad. I trust him, and don't suspect him of doing anything. But I would rather have him not talk to her. I also don't want my boyfriend to think that I snoop around because I don't. It was an accident but my friends said that he will think that I snoop if I tell him.


Thank you.

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I doubt it, again, you stumbled accross this accidently, but being his gf, you have a right to ask about it. It wasn't like you went looking for the message.


If the situation was reversed, and he stumbled upon a message by a guy friend of yours saying the same things, would he worry about being considered a snoop?

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He should have told you what she wrote and in addition it should be a reason for him not to arrange a meeting between you guys and her. She is making a move on him, she is not behaving like a friend of yours, but as far as I can see, your bf is not stopping her. I think in this situation I'd tell him you read the whole thing. He may be angry for reading his private stuff, but would you really want this thing to become a huge thing that is not talked about between you?

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I would most definitely tell him. Communication is the key to a successful relationship and not telling him will allow this to burn inside of you and could well create a bigger issue down the road. Just relay the story to him just like you did us stating that you thought you were logged on to your own account, read the email, and want to talk about it. The rest should take care of itself from there. Good luck....

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I would most definitely tell my boyfriend I read it! It was an accident anyway. But I wouldnt actually give a hoot whether he thought I was snooping or disbelieved me. What the hell is he doing hiding soemthing like this from you.


That is so disloyal and hurtful. He should have told you what she said and also he should have been angry with her for even saying it. I know my BF would have been.


I would have no trust for this guy at all and she would be getting a very firm email direct from me aswell!


You go ahead and ask him... Good Luck

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