how to stop thinking about her?

[imthedjone]

ok so ive been broken up with my ex now for two months. we dated for five years. ive done everything, ive gotten rid of everything in my house that reminds me of her ie. clothes she left, pictures, letters, and gifts she gave me. ive done many new routines and took up new hobbies, i started working out again and running.

 

 

I feel that ive done pretty well in trying to move on, but i cant seem to stop thinking about her. Im enjoying my life and this new freedom, but i cant seem to get her out of my mind. What does this mean?? why cant i shake her out of my head? any help on getting rid of the thoughts please let me know.

[Keyman]

Time, brother, time. You are doing well, but you have to remember, you can't remove the memories of 5 years in just 2 months without drastic brain surgery, mind washing or (my favorite) overuse of self tazering!

 

Even if you were to meet someone new to either get laid or get involved with, she will still be on your mind.

 

It will all pass from your mind when it does.

[uofagirl]

It's still a fresh wound. One that will go away with more and more time.

 

All I can say is stay busy and let time do it's thing. Five years is a long time to be with someone and you aren't expected to be healed in two months.

[Macleod]

Time my friend, Time..This is probably the most over-used phrase on ENA, but the truest..

 

Just keep yourself occupied doing things you love and hanging with good, positive people.

[Me and myself]

Yeah, time is the best thing...but sometimes it takes a lot of....well, time!

 

You can also use "The Swish" to help you associate a memory to something more neutral.

 

M&M

[Talus]

You are too focused on getting over her. You're probably thinking to yourself every day "am I over her yet?" or something along those lines. Just go with it. Be patient and just accept that this is going to take time. Don't beat yourself up about it.

 

It's like a scab. You keep picking at it it's never going to fully heal. You leave that nasty thing alone and it will heal. So stop picking at your scabs and let it heal in time. Shift your focus from moving on, feeling better and getting over her, to just accepting it and go with the flow. There will be * * * * days, there will be times worse than others and it can feel like you are getting no where.

 

But stop pressuring yourself to feel better. Stop pressuring yourself to get over her and move on. The more pressure you pile on yourself, the longer it will take. Keep doing what you enjoy and having fun. Soon these memories will stop hurting and you'll be able to look back and smile and be happy with where you are.

[Celestialagape54]

I know that everyone says this but everyone is right the only thing that you need is time. You are doing great by getting rid of the personal items, out of sight out of mind.

 

You need to allow yourself to gradually forget about her. There is nothing wrong with thinking about her however the thing you must remember is not to let her interfere with your routine.

 

Its normal for you to think about her, you were with her for a long time. Eventually as time goes by you will see that you will think of her less and less till eventually you wont think of her. You wont even realize that you are not thinking of her anymore, it will happen I promise you.

 

Time heals all wounds its up to you, you can choose to sit there and let her run your life ( even though she is no longer there ) or you can choose to accept that time will heal whatever wounds you have.

 

Good luck and keep us posted.

[KiNo]

Yea~ Don't even bother to think how you gonna get over her, in fact focus on how you can make yourself happy alone, think of something that can be done at the moment, plan something ahead on your schedule.

 

Time ya bro, NC is best and do really concentrate on something that will keep your attention all the time, for some days, it will not totally get you over your ex, but it sure help by a lot.