With a Little Help from My Friends

[Himynamesbob]

Great song and all but... how does a person who has no friends get by?

 

I seriously don't know how i lasted this long to be honest. Ever since i entered middle school, i've only ever had one friend - my cousin. He's the same age as me and is in the exact same social situation. Other than him there's nobody.

 

Just to give you an idea, i finally got a cell phone at 20 years old, one month ago. I've used 1 minute and sent 46 texts. The majority of which were to my cousin. Basically it's a 66 dollar a month calculator.

 

I'm like the guy who everybody sorta remembers from school but nobody really cares exists

 

I look at my friends on facebook and i see pictures of people having fun and partying. All people that i know and have probably shared countless classes with over the years and i wonder why it isn't me having the time of my life in those pictures too.

 

These are supposed to be the best years of my life and pretty soon they'll be gone forever and all i'll have to look forward to is a full time job and even more difficult times trying to find friends. If i don't enjoy life now, i suspect it shall only get worse as i grow older. Why continue to suffer?

 

So i guess i'm asking - How am i supposed to get by? If you were in a similar situation, how did you get by?

[Keyman]

Log on to link removed and find a group in your area (although not sure if Nowhere land has a zip code!) that shares some of your interests. Or find a group that you might be interested in finding more about. Or find a coffee group or a friendship group. Then go along and talk to everyone about everything you can. Be friendly, be nice. Keep going week after week after week and even take your cousin if you need to. After some time, you should start to make friends, especially if it relates to your interests.

 

It's really not that hard. The only real thing that will hold you back is you and excuses. Get out there and start showing people you are a good guy and that it's cool to hang with you and before you know it, you'll have friends. But, sit around and complain that you're shy, nobody likes you, you'll never make any friends etc etc, and guess what...you won't make any friends.

[Dancergirl425]

maybe ask someone in ur class that throws parties to be your partner for a group project. and then while you're working on it talk about partying and see if you can get invited to it.

[Tetsuo_Shima]

with all due respect, i was a loner in high school myself, it was after leaving school that i got really popular, now everyone wants some of my time and i find it tough to manage that haha. everyone hits there time to shine sooner or later, don't sweat it, ive been where you are.

[Kantriakhor]

Not to be cruel, but it's partly your choice to not be in those pictures with your friends at those parties, hanging out, etc etc. Do you put the effort in? Make yourself available? Go out with them on the fly?

 

Personally, I find making friends in college to be a waste of my time (I'm there to study, not to socialize and will reap the consequences later but, for now, couldn't care less) but can understand why it's important to other people so all I can say is put your best foot forward and be open, sociable, be interested in their lives and communicate it.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

Many people put all of their acqaintances on facebook. It doesn't matter how many drinking/partying "friends" a person has..the true test of friendship is when you have a problem and need help. How many of those drinking/partying "friends" would actually stick around when the party is over..I bet not many.

[Himynamesbob]

Not to be cruel, but it's partly your choice to not be in those pictures with your friends at those parties, hanging out, etc etc. Do you put the effort in? Make yourself available? Go out with them on the fly?

 

I don't hang out with these people. I cant put any effort in or make myself available. How do you expect me to go out with them on the fly if they never talk to me let alone ever asked me to do something with them?

 

I don't believe at this point in time it's my choice at all. I think maybe it was years ago when i decided not to be as open with these people. High school has come and past and i am not an all a part of these peoples lives anymore. How does that make it my choice to hang out with them?

[Himynamesbob]

Many people put all of their acqaintances on facebook. It doesn't matter how many drinking/partying "friends" a person has..the true test of friendship is when you have a problem and need help. How many of those drinking/partying "friends" would actually stick around when the party is over..I bet not many.

 

Not many is still more than i have currently.

[katarina6]

Forget the "friends" on Facebook and how you're not hanging out with them and go out and meet new people. I understand how Facebook can sting whereas before it was easy to live in ignorant bliss as to what others you went to school with did without you but now it's right there in front your face! I've done this myself where I compare myself to people I'd gone to school with on Facebook and thought I missed out. It might be worth it to cancel it.