tonybgolfer Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Bottom line, I need help and advise from somewhere. I am seperated from the women I deerly love. My two children live with her. She has filed for a divorce and I am totally devestated. The cause of this, in a nutshell my stupidity. I cheated on her and I have no excuses at all. She is truelly the love of my life, we have been married for approaching 20 years, we have two wonderful children whom I adore. I have tried and tried for the last couple of years asking and pleeding for foregiveness but she won't have anything to do with it. We speak pretty much daily and its generally OK as long as I don't discuss "us". I know everyone will say tough...you got what you deserve and your probably right, however I honestly and whole heartedly love this women and I can honestly see us really happy together. She is beautiful, funny, sexy and everything I ever wanted.....and I just don't know why I acted the way I did back then. Since then I have grown a lot and have realised that family is everything and happiness is family life. I just need a helping hand. I am being very honest here, I know I'm to blame, but I am in Love with this women. I've tried everything, pleeding, promising, helping her where ever I can, I just don't know what else to do and feel my times running out. Please help, I am a nice guy who's made some stupid mistakes and is very very remorseful..........thank you for understanding, Tony Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 KEep showing her your remorseful, thats all you can do. Its her choice, nothing you can do will make her magically forgive you, she might just need time and space or it might really be over. Link to comment
tonybgolfer Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 Thank you....everyone says "time" and I guess it is. I know I've done wrong and I just want to put right, thats the tough thing, wnating to right your wrong but not being allowed to, thanks again. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 You can only put it right or try to, by making sure she KNOWS how much remorse you feel. Link to comment
tonybgolfer Posted May 21, 2009 Author Share Posted May 21, 2009 I hope she does...I have told her so many times. Link to comment
SapphireNoir10 Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 I know, but dont be shocked if she doesnt forgive you. ITs a big thing to forgive. You have to be patient. Personally I wouldnt take you back, some people can get over it in time, some people really cant. Link to comment
atelis Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 Without actually understanding why you cheated, i don't know that you can really say you've changed. Men usually cheat through fear.........fear of commitment. Cheating and affairs are a way of keeping one foot out of a relationship, it's a way of keeping from giving 100% of your heart and soul to your partner. So what is it that you fear that made you cheat? Asking for forgiveness and being remorseful is one thing, but being able to tell your partner why you did it would be so much more powerful. Link to comment
twomonks Posted May 21, 2009 Share Posted May 21, 2009 ^^^^^ I TOTALLY agree with this... it is up to you to seek counseling to try and understand what was happening to you (both) during this time and what led you to look elsewhere.. Good luck. Link to comment
Stuffy Nose Posted May 22, 2009 Share Posted May 22, 2009 BlueAfterglow08 is right. Some people can forgive, some can't. Link to comment
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