Delusional Kisses Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 The vicious cycle I've been in for three years with the Best friend..... I can't move and I can't possibly begin a normal relationship with someone while he is still in the back of my mind. I know what I have to do, but its more than difficult. Last Tuesday, I started NC. And I've made it through 6 days now. I knew it was probable that he would contact me soon and would bait me with something. That happened today. He texted me to tell me he had had his wisdom teeth pulled. He knew I would be concerned about him and respond immediately to see how he was feeling. I did not. Its been the most difficult afternoon for me. I was discussing the situation with my friend and she said "What will he do if you don't respond?" and I said "I don't know. I've never not responded in the past three years". Wow....I feel so proud of myself and so lost at the same time. It will get better, right? Link to comment
chickidee23 Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 I know how you feel. I dated someone for a few months and, when it didn't work out, we tried to stay friends - I still really like him but managed to overcome those feelings and be a friend. I've been there for him through everything - bad break ups with other girls, sad and drunken late-night phone calls, everything. I am in a serious relationship with someone now and this friend (or ex, whatever he should be called) has confessed he still has feelings for me. Well, I still have feelings for him, too. But I am not willing to give up what I have with my current boyfriend for this friend because he has never once shown me that he cares about me more than he cares about himself. It's been so very hard but I have managed to slowly cut him out of my life. Part of me worries I will always have these unrequited feelings for him and that it's going to affect current or future relationships but the best I can do is just force myself to move on and let go. It's been a tough road - I miss him so much sometimes - but he is not good for me, he is not good to me. And being the girl he leans on when he needs someone is just not good enough for me. Is your friend like this and, if so, is this good enough for you? Because it shouldn't be. We all deserve someone who loves us as much as we love them. Link to comment
Hammerhead Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 only you know for sure. i hope so!..if thats what you want.. in general it will become easyer as time goes bye...question is: is this what you really want? Link to comment
Delusional Kisses Posted April 21, 2009 Author Share Posted April 21, 2009 Of course it is not what I want.....I just don't know what else to do. In a perfect world, things would be different. We'd be together, but we are not. Link to comment
chickidee23 Posted April 21, 2009 Share Posted April 21, 2009 You have to do what's best for you. And that isn't always what you want. Be strong and if you need some support, feel free to message me. I know where you're coming from. Link to comment
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