UKPete Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Hi, My gf and I are having a baby together - we both want this and were both so happy when we found out. We were great together and had such a good laugh with each other, we talked loads. The pregnancy has been tough though. She's been sick, and getting lower, and I didn't adapt well straight away to the changes but I have really worked hard and adapted and would do anything for her. However, she's told me she isn't sure we make a good couple any more - I'm gobsmacked and gutted - I want her and baby more than anything. She is taking tome to think, I'm giving her time and space and trying to be the man she fell in love with. It's like her personality just disappeared when the sickness kicked in but I am as supportive as I can be and help wherever I can. I remember how good we are together and think hormones must be responsible for alot of this - but I can't seem to do anything to snap her out of it - she really has struggled with sickness etc. It shows no sign of stopping - over 4 months of sickness and nausea now. It's affected us badly - has anyone else struggled like this and how can I improve things? I really want to see her smile and laugh again, and I want her here 100%! Help! Link to comment
waveseer Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Have you ever considered marriage? Not that I think all pregnant couples should be married or anything, but maybe she feels insecure in your relationship. Pregnancy has a way of making a woman feel uncertain of her future. Link to comment
jengh Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Her mind and body are going through a lot of changes right now. She's probably incredibly stressed out and hormonal and questioning everything. I'd give her some space, but continue to reaffirm how much you love her and want to be with her. My best friend had a baby last June and throughout the entire pregnancy, she kept going on and on about how she didn't want to be with her (now) fiance, how she didn't know what she wanted, etc. etc. Her baby boy is approaching a year old now and she and fiance are doing better than ever. So from my (very) limited experience, that's what I can offer you. I think once her hormones are a bit more balanced and she's more well adjusted, she'll be able to see things a bit more clearly. You said she's really sick right now, she's probably feeling pretty vulnerable...just be the man she fell in love with, be there for her, support her and hopefully she'll come around. I do wish you the best in this. Welcome to ena Link to comment
hayky3126 Posted April 1, 2009 Share Posted April 1, 2009 Being pregnant literally takes a woman out of her typical environment and makes us somebody completely different. Things we usually like are things that drive us crazy. Things we usually cant stand become something we crave to have. I have known lots of women that honestly couldnt even be around their spouse because they would get "sick." Im not saying you are the reason she is sick by any means, but its very common for women to feel completely unlike themselves for some time. Hopefully, once the baby is here or even closer into her third trimester, you will have better luck! Link to comment
bussmann78 Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 i completely understand what you are going through. the same thing happened with my girlfriend. she is now seven months, and we are so close and now she is having doubts. it crushes your heart. im trying to give her space and just let her know that im here for her. at times it is impossible to discuss anything with her, which ends in an argument, then ultimatly im the one stressing her out. hang in there and dont give up. good luck! Link to comment
Anna. Posted April 2, 2009 Share Posted April 2, 2009 Don't even think about breaking up. It WILL get better. Link to comment
TheSmilingTurnip Posted April 5, 2009 Share Posted April 5, 2009 There are actually a lot of threads where the guy comes on here because his pregnant girlfriend is questioning the relationship during pregnancy. Sounds like it's kinda typical. I don't see a lot of married guys posting this - it's usually a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. Link to comment
Lamprey Posted April 14, 2009 Share Posted April 14, 2009 As many said, many women go nuts during pregnancy. It's not their fault, their bodies pump them full of weird hormones - all a man can do is suffer through it. I'd would jokingly suggest that ideally, pregnant women would be shipped off to some farm for 9 months and returned to the happy father with the baby (the farm would be located next to the one they ship adolescent boys to between the ages of 14-17). But that would be wrong and not funny. So I'll never even think of suggesting that Link to comment
BellaDonna Posted April 15, 2009 Share Posted April 15, 2009 I'd would jokingly suggest that ideally, pregnant women would be shipped off to some farm for 9 months This would actually not be a bad idea if you replaced "farm" with "SPA". I would have been all for it! UkPete, any updates? I hope things are going better for you. Link to comment
Alezia Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I've never felt repulsed by my partner but I do remember feeling bad that we did not follow the traditional steps in our relationship ex: moving together, getting engaged, getting married, buying a house etc... when I first got pregnant. Link to comment
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