rebelfac Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 She left me after 12 years of marriage ( 14 years together) four months ago. I didn't show her love and affection and have since learned just how important affection is. ( I treated her too much like one of the guys and never learned just how important affection is to women) The next relationship will benefit but it's too bad I lost the love of my life. What single mistake did you others make and what 4 songs remind you of your lost love? Hall & Oats - She's gone Michael mcdonald - I keep forgetting (how things will never be the same again" Eagles - best of my love John Lennon - woman Link to comment
ellandroader Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 For me, I don't think I could think of four but the ones that apply to me recently are; Against All Odds - Phil Collins Hurricane Waters - Citizen Cope If you could Read my Mind - Gordon Lightfoot Link to comment
UCLAMike Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Why would one voluntarily listen to songs that remind them of the hurtful breakup? 4 of them? what is going on dude I feel like you have more serious issues than the break up. Link to comment
ellandroader Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Why would one voluntarily listen to songs that remind them of the hurtful breakup? 4 of them? what is going on dude I feel like you have more serious issues than the break up. I guess sometimes it helps you convey what you are feeling when you yourself can't put it into words. Songs, and writing (like in a journal) can be therapeutic that way. I see your point too. But each to their own, we're all different and we all handle grief in our own ways. Link to comment
waveseer Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Tie a yellow ribbon 'round the old oak tree. Link to comment
midnightrambler Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Street Fightin' Man Link to comment
rebelfac Posted February 21, 2009 Author Share Posted February 21, 2009 I have issues? Look at yourself hanging out here at all hours of the day. You definitely lack in judgement. Get a clue Link to comment
D_Lish Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 I would never listen to songs that reminded me of an ex partner or break up... Prolongs your grief I think....and I'd want to get over it as quickly as possible and without listening to some 'slit wristing' songs... Listening to feel good, happy songs would be better therapy for me Walking on Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves...for instance. Link to comment
HerDestiny Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 I understand what UCLAMike is saying. I was wondering the same thing. If the songs remind you of lost love, they'll upset you, not make you feel better. And like D Lish said, it prolongs your grief. I also understand relating to the songs and not being able to just *poof* feel better and get over it. I was guilty of doing similar things in the past and learned since then. It's much better to relate to songs that don't prolong your grief or keep you dwelling on it. Link to comment
UCLAMike Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 I have issues? Look at yourself hanging out here at all hours of the day. You definitely lack in judgement. Get a clue what? what does posting about questions I have on break up pain have to do with voluntarily seeking for reminders of the ex? Link to comment
Lisa_Lisa Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 Songs that remind me... and make me smile when I think of her. Like You'll Never See Me Again - Alicia Keys Be Without You - Mary J Blige Differences - Ginuine Low - Florida (Cos she wears apple bottom jeans) If we werent together - I wouldnt want to listen to these songs. Link to comment
WomanWriter Posted February 21, 2009 Share Posted February 21, 2009 We didn't break up for any specific mistake. He had personal issues and didn't want the pressure of impending marriage. It wasn't the relationship itself...but... I did make some mistakes in the relationship. My biggest mistake was probably that I was too insecure. If he didn't call, say "I love you" etc. I'd get kind of upset. I didn't really nag but I would tell him I felt like he didn't love me anymore. He didn't like me doubting him and I don't blame him for that. He felt like I expected him to show me more public affection than he was comfortable with. He said that he expressed his love through everything he did for me and felt like I was basically being supercial for wanting more. I was also kind of mean to him about some of the things he was interested in. I acted like his hobbies were silly and unimportant. I should have respected him more. Songs? Steppin Out (Joe Jackson); If I Aint Got You (Alicia Keys); Space Age Love Song (Flock of Seagulls); Emotions and Photons (Freezepop) Link to comment
RougeKali823 Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 Songs that remind me... and make me smile when I think of her. Like You'll Never See Me Again - Alicia Keys Be Without You - Mary J Blige Differences - Ginuine Low - Florida (Cos she wears apple bottom jeans) If we werent together - I wouldnt want to listen to these songs. Love all of those-Be Without You reminds me of my ex 2 exes ago and Differences of the most current one lol Oh and Like You'll Never See Me Again-the new guy who might be my next ex (j/k) Low-because I wear apple bottoms (jeans and shoes) Link to comment
DaveTrump Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 It's hard to avoid music, tv and movies. At the begginning it all reminds you of your ex and well helps you get the sadness out as opposed to sitting in silence or whatever. I think it's a healthy part of the grieving - they key is to not repeatedly listen to the songs in a cycle of doom and gloom. You'll know you're healing as the songs don't make you sad anymore, you get bored of them and want to listen to new songs to create new memories to. Link to comment
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