why is it that...

[RLW]

Haha, it's called sod's law. (Murphy's law if you are American). It happened to me too, and I couldn't understand it. I think you give off this vibe that you don't care anymore, you have your girl, etc.

 

from my understanding murphy's law simply states if something can go wrong, it will. i see no correlation.

[l0vel0rn]

Forbidden fruit maybe. Some girls just like knowing they can push your buttons. They base their whole sense of self esteem on their ability to charm guys into wanting them. In many of these cases, they may not even want the guy, but they chase him just enough to get him to want them. It’s about ego, pride and it’s very selfish, and it usually is very destructive to the guy. It can destroy his existing relationship as well as break his heart and screw with his head.

[waveseer]

i would agree with this except how does it explain when i woman doesn't know the man or if the man is in a relationship.

 

I suppose that's where the anti-desperation aura comes into play. You are more relaxed and approachable. Not too eager, just friendly and it's attractive.

[Northalius]

would this go for single girls too? how would a single girl attract a single guy? Try to look happy and confident right? what if you dont feel that way though..or you're happy but you worry waaaay too much about everything...

 

actually, let me put it this way...one thing that I gather from this thread is this: People who are taken are happy and confident, they dont have to try to pick anyone up because they are, assuming anyways, in a happy relationship.

 

Single people, however, dont have this so called "radiance" about them, since you only seems to get it when you are taken. Single people want to find someone, but dont have the confidence taken people have.

 

How the does a single person find love then?

 

The key is to love yourself first, because if you can't live single and be comfortable with it, then throwing all that weight on someone else will just screw things up in the long run. If anything, look for a partner, not someone that supposedly "completes" you.

 

Once you have a foundation within you to be comfortable with yourself, and respecting yourself, you'll eventually be confident and that comfort will only shine brighter toward everyone else, thus making you much more attractive to the opposite gender.

 

Looking desperate is certainly not attractive. It shows you do not love being with yourself, so you need someone to distract you from yourself in order to [supposedly] be happy in life. That's not a good place to be!

 

Once you look content with being by yourself, people will just naturally think "He must be a nice guy if he likes himself so much that he's not looking for some female to distract him from who he is when he's alone with himself."

 

I'd suggest many people like this seek out a counselor to talk to! This will help a lot!