Hello my cousin,drug,drinking,and ia m so afarid for her!@

[Donna1985]

i am so sad right now and i really need to vent and talk to someone and have NO one! and it is making it hard to breathe ok i am goign to basically let it all out. i am sorry if this is long, ok i am 18 years old and i have 1 friend becasue i cant trust people and she is the only good friend i can trust and my family is pretty messed up with my dad used to being a drunbk and pot head and my mother until ayear ago popping pills and drinking and smoking and doing cocaine. now i am this cousin how i recently gotten alot closer to int he past 3 years we are like sister we know just about everything about each other. well she went on homestudy 4 weeks ago in nevada. she is 15 turning 16 in may. before she went on homestudy she had no friends cause everyone left her after she was raped at a party and they thought she lied about it. and she had a old friend how she cut off cause of her drug problem. now she is hanging with her again and for the past few weeks it was all good i talekd to tehm both 4 times a day and before she meet "jennie" and started hanging with here again she went out on the weekend and drank a lil bit and smoke once or twice nothing too bad she knew her limits, now she is drinking and getting drunk every other day and getting high every 2-3 days now. and i mean i love her i now its hard to quit but i know what drugs can do to a person and its just so hard for me and right now i am crying so hard cause i love her so much and i dont want anything bad to happen to her. and i tried to talk to her about it 20 mintues ago while her and jennie where lighting up a bong, and she got really angry and i told her i loved her and how it made me feel and asked her about it and she took it the wrong way and i am goin to write her a email btu i dotn knwo what to say i dont want to offened her even more i mean i love her so much i dont think i can deal with losing her but you seen the commerical that says if your friend was in toruble you would help them and it shows the pic of a girls watchign her friend drown. i asked katie(my cousin) woudl she helop or wanted ot be helped and she told me yeahso i dont know what to do i am so confused and have no one at all to talk to i am just going to sit here and cry my eyes out all night

[avman]

Hello Donna and welcome to eNotalone,

 

You are obviously very upset about your friend. I can really understand that. You are in a very tough spot regarding your friend. I think I would be really scared too if I were you.

 

Well right now you've got some difficult choices to make. It sounds like you have already tried to approach your friend and help her with this, but she has rejected you. She may feel like she knows what she is doing and you are holding her back. Drugs can do that to a person and often they don't even realize they are in trouble until its too late.

 

If you want to send your friend an email, tell her how much you love her, and that you are worried about some of the things she is doing. Then list out those things and say WHY they worry you. Try not to be too emotional (I know it will be hard) but just lay everything out with how you feel. And then at the end make sure you tell her you are there for her no matter what. She will need that in the days ahead.

 

This may or may not work. And then you have an even more difficult decision to make. Are you willing to try and get her the help she needs, even though she feels she doesn't. You will, in effect, have to save her from herself. And the way to do this is to tell someone what she is doing. This may be her parents, or a school counselor, or a pastor, or the authorities. I'm not sure what kind of relationship you have with her family, but I guess I would start there. I will warn you, your friend will react very negatively to this. But its a risk you will have to take in order to save your friend who you love.

 

I'm sorry for this situation. Know that we are all here for you to help and support you through this. We will be with you every step of the way if you need us. Please let us know how else we can help.

 

avman