Advice for guys that can't talk to girls

[scaryhobo]

I've seen alot of posts from guys who have a hard time talking to girls and I figured you could use some advice from someone who was once just like you (and to a certain extent still is).

 

The single most important thing you need to talk to girl is CONFIDENCE. And you won't become more confident if you try to be confident just to get girls, you need to work on your confidence in general, and don't even worry about getting girls. You need to work on improving yourself. Find things to do that give you confidence, hang out with people that make you feel good about yourself, and most of all, give yourself credit for who you are and what you've acomplished. I've acomplished alot for someone my age, but I still didn't have alot of confidence until I really started to give myself credit for the things I've done and the man I had to be to acomplished those things. I realized that I had just as much reason to be confident as anyone else, and this really helped me. Once you have confidence you will find yourself more at ease with women and it will be alot easier to talk to them.

 

Confidence alone isn't always enough though, especially if you don't have much experiance talking to girls. Aproching a girl can still shatter your confidence if you don't have the right attitude about it. You need to break down the situation, and realize it isn't as big a deal as it feels like it is. This isn't the last girl on earth. In fact, theres a good chance she may turn out to be a b****, or at least someone who just isn't your type. If you are thinking about approaching a girl, don't look at it like you're trying to pick her up or get her to like you, look at the situation like you're trying to find out if she's even worth your time. If she is, it'll be easy, you soon be able to relax and have a pleasant conversation with her. If she blows you off then she's probly a b**** or an ice princess and not worth your time. And if you flub it, just play it off and don't be afraid to be what you are, a shy guy giving it a try. If you just play it off she'll probly be turned on by your honesty about who you are instead of being turned off by the flubed comeone. And remember she'll probly be flattered that you were interested in her enough to approach her. Think about how you'd feel if a girl came up to you, even if you weren't interested in her. You'd be flattered right? Approach the girl and start talking to her, and even if she wasn't interested in you before, she might develope an interest in the guy that had the confidence to approach her.

 

The third thing is just to practice. Approach girls just for the hell of it, even if you expect to be shot down. If you expect to be shot down it will take alot of the pressure off. Approach girls you're not even interested in just for the experiance. Approach girls just for the rush it gives you. Eventually you'll develope confidence and skills that will make it easier.

 

I'm not gonna pretend like I've turned myself into a pimp that can have any girl I want. There are still alot of situations I have trouble with (I can't approach any girl any time yet, although I'd like to be able to someday). But I have come a long way from who I was, and I'm at least as good at talking to girls as 90% of the guys out there.

 

Hope this helps

[Slagar]

Nice post scaryhobo

It applies to me a little, and I am sure there are many people that will find this helpful. Keep up the good work

[ck]

Who gave up hope; there are never any of those topics here

 

Maybe I should make one?

[humanoidcontent]

I have just come out of a BAD case of this- a girl I liked had her locker RIGHT beside mine and everday I would set my goal to say hi- but I never ever did say a word to her...

 

0X