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Need some advice please


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i have been with my bf for 3 years now and we have a two year old child together. i think maybe we rushed into things too early as we are both only in our early twenties. at first he was the perfect bf and dad, always doing things for us and making me feel good about myself but for the last month or so all he seems to want to do is see his friends all the time and go out drinking, leaving me to look after the baby. we decided to have a break and he moved out, but we have still stayed close, seeing each other everyday and talkin on the phone. I know i want to be with him aslong as he changes a few things and decides what his prioritys are (me an the baby) but now hes saying he doesnt know what he wants anymore. all he seems to have done since we have split is go to his friends houses drinking, or go to the pub. I know he isnt seeing anyone else i just think he wants the single life again but he wont talk to me about it. I sit at home everynight crying because i have got noone to talk to. we used to be like soulmates. i need him to realise whats important before its too late because i know in a few months he'll regret this but by then it will be too late. any advice would be greatly appreciated. thanx xxxx

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Hi there! You've come to the right place. I think it's important that you tell him what you want out of your relationship and then leave him alone. Because you have kept in contact with him he's having all that he wants - the single life and the family. If he's still telling you that he loves you and has really given you no reason as to not believe him, then maybe he truly doesn't know what he wants right now and that doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't want you...I hope that makes sense.


Have a child at a young age can really scare someone and it seems as though he had been doing perfectly well with the situation in the past. The thing is though, is...were you both allowing one another time away from the home and the baby? This is very important in any relationship...especially when there is a child involved. You say that you don't have anyone...why is this? Do you not have some friends and family to confide in and get together with? You should. Maybe this was a problem in the relationship?? - too much time together and not enough time apart? It's just a suggestion, I don't know for sure.


But you have to give him his space and see what happens. He should still be a responsible father though and come and get the baby to build a lasting bond there.


Good Luck and do some NC...he'll miss you and see that the grass isn't greener...although, you both should allow one another time away with friends.

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