The No Contact Challenge Result

[bkunt04]

day 5, forgot to post yesterday because honestly i think i've just forgotten the entire thing is supposed to be hurting me.

 

every good or bad thought about her that passes through my head i quickly discard it and think of something else. like i said before, keeping myself constantly busy and around my friends has made it so ridiculously easy i cannot even explain how quickly and easily i have gotten over the entire thing.

 

i've realized that there REALLY IS absolutely no reason to dwell on the past, or think about what could happen. i am living completely in the moment, and when i focus on things in the future i focus on my career and other small things i am involved in.

 

i set dates for upcoming events, for instance, im going to a water park this weekend with a bunch of friends. when someone asks about my relationship with her, i say we decided to break up for a while because she is moving. and thats all there is to it. if they ask more questions i say 'its whatever'. and it really is whatever, because i have no control over what happens, so i LET GO.

 

the entire situation with relationships i can relate first hand to the scene in fight club where tyler burns his hand with lye and water. you have to stop worrying and stop trying to control what could and might happen and JUST LET GO.

 

i will update the no contact challenge thread every now and then but mainly i am over it. until she comes back into my life herself, there is absolutely nothing i can or will do. i am very proud of myself, and to anyone that feels down, we all know that behind the darkest night there is a brighter day. the difference is BELIEVING IT.

 

big ups to superdave btw

[lisa1126]

Thanks for your encouraging update to your NC.

 

I know it helps a lot of people to hear about it. It's so hard to believe and feel that you will feel better, but reading about other's experience really helps.

 

Thanks.

[theforgotten]

congrats bkunt04!

just keep your head up.

i think we did a good thing by letting them go. we gotta focus on moving forward and not looking back.

[GettingThere]

Encouraging words. I will be go grateful when I get there. Day 16 for me.

[bkunt04]

an update to this, i am now on day 10 (the only reason i even know what day is because i started on the 1st) and feel just the same if not better than i did on day 5.

 

like i said before, i have been constantly keeping myself around my friends whether they are ones that i normally go out with, or ones that i have not been around with too much in the past. the result of this is i have met MANY new people which has taken my mind away even further. and although i am certainly not ready to move on into a new relationship, i have a date with someone new i have met on friday. we will probably just become good friends, but the fact of the matter is i pushed myself to defeat the fear of rejection.

 

i know it may sound like i am just building myself up and up and up, but it is not because i want to look good, its because i know everyone is capable of it and because i am so proud of myself, and it is such a good feeling i have to share it. i become so attached to things, BELIEVE ME, if i was someone else reading this post i would sigh in discouragement. but now i KNOW with the right mindset, anything is possible.

 

NC really does work, and when combined with the determination to keep one's self busy at all times and understand life is too short to worry, it is absolutely incredible how much one learns about him/herself, and how much of a better person rises from the ashes.

 

EDIT: i know all the good tips in the world have probably been posted before, but one thing i also found is LISTEN TO MOTIVATING MUSIC. anything that drives you to become a better person, LISTEN TO IT. sad love songs are not the way to go. i am someone that loves music, so this i was a HUGE help to me during my struggle.

[bkunt04]

day 26, feels so good to let go