What can i do to get her out of my mind

[Sadman84]

I guess its the fact that its been a year, last summer from may 15th to july 12th we were broken up but kept talking on and off, going on dates and all that comes with being together with someone. She's heavy on my mind, i hope that after july it will get easier cause my last actual memories with her end in mid july.

 

She called it off after we'd been talking on and off when she met some other guy. She's still with him today, we dated our senior year of high school then 4 years of college, she graduated, i had one more year left even though we started out at the same time. She broke up with me and i was single the whole last year which was my final year of college.

 

I just can't seem to get her out of my mind, i havn't wanted to shed a tear since febuary but all of the sudden i can feel them coming all the time. I see things that remind me of her and it stings so much. All i can do is think "does she ever think about me, does she miss me, does it make her sad"

 

In all honesty i dont think so, she's living with her now boy friend, in july they'll be together a year, and our 4.5 years is just part of her past, but for me it feels like its still part of my life and that i'm just waiting to pick up where we left off.

 

What do i do to get her out of my head? I have friends, i'm not dating anyone, but i feel so wrapped up in her memory, i want to talk to her so bad, but i know it wont accomplish anything other than make her dislike me. please talk to me, i'm so lonely, and my friends are tired of me talking about her.

[wtm78]

when you think about her... give yourself 5 mins to think about her... and once 5 mins is up.. focus on what you are doing...

[Sadman84]

i like that

[greywolf]

I'm sorry you're going through a tough time. I know it's hard. I suggest you find some new hobbies that you really enjoy doing. I spent most of my breakup watching anime and reading books

[mia1207]

Whatever. All that advice looks good on paper and in theory, but I've learned the hard way that they don't work as well in the real world. But hey, give them a try; you might have better luck than I did.

[greywolf]

Whatever. All that advice looks good on paper and in theory, but I've learned the hard way that they don't work as well in the real world. But hey, give them a try; you might have better luck than I did.

 

You're right. Sometimes no matter what you do, it will still be difficult. But I believe that it's better than nothing.

[Sadman84]

I dont mind the advice, i asked for it, i know it wont work every time, but i do like to know i have some plan for when things go wrong, like when i'm in the middle of my day and she pops in my head and won't leave.

 

I have picked up new hobbies, jogging, playing piano. I do these but even when i play the piano i play songs that remind me of her, i dont mean to but it just happens. and then i go into a spiral of memories of her.

[JITMoney]

Whatever. All that advice looks good on paper and in theory, but I've learned the hard way that they don't work as well in the real world. But hey, give them a try; you might have better luck than I did.

 

Thats one of the first things i realized durring my break up is to always realize that its MIND over MOOD. It sounds like a crock, but THINK GOOD TOUGHTS, about doing all thest things to move on. If you go into it thinking its a bad idea, then your doomed before you even started.

 

It is rough. I think we ALL KNOW the feeling of hopeless, heartache, stomach pains, non stop thinking, and worrying about our ex's

 

IT IS TOUGH... but give it time, and go into it with a SEMI positive atttitued.

 

What i have started doing is TALKING OUT LOUD TO MY SELF.. (sounds crazy) but i say outloud what i would say to lets say one of my friends who was going through the same thing i was. It helps when you look at it from outside the box.

 

Hang in there everyone...your not alone

[Loris]

Everyone has their own ways of dealing with things as everyone hurts in different ways and degrees of pain.

 

If you're in education still you might want to undertake a basic part time job, like a bar job. Loads of new people to meet, new skills (and chicks). If you're looking for employment after education, this can be a nervous time but your whole world is waiting for you. I'm currently out of work, sat at home but spending most of my time applying for jobs. It's lonely and thoughts of my ex are rife every 5 mins. I took a bar job to keep me occupied (and for some extra cash) and whenever I'm there I don't think about my ex.

 

I know exactly what you're going through, as do many others on this site. It's painful knowing your ex is with someone else but believe me when I tell you that there are going to be a million and one things that she does or sees that reminds her of you. Hang in there buddy. Get yourself out there and meet some new people or contact old friends. As soon as you're able to focus your attentions on another woman AFTER YOU FIND YOURSELF A JOB/FINISH EDUCATION, you'll feel a million bucks.

 

Trust me, the less you know about her life, who she's with and what she's doing you'll be able to move on. Best wishes, dude. You're a bright lad and I know you can do this.

[Sadman84]

Thanks Loris

[cptanarky]

hey bro i know how u feel been almost a year for me out of a relationship the same length... she is now getting married to a guy who used to be my mate. I think about her everyday but i doubt she even gives me a thought at all. i guess you just gota understand that life goes on... and you only got one! so make the best of it... im planning to go traveling around the world which keeps me happy, when your out just look around and see that there a millions of people out there that you havent meet and maybe your breaking up with this girl has destined you to meet someone else that you will be even happier with... anyway good luck dude.

[Only the Strong]

Trust me bro, you will meet someone someday who will make it clear why things didn't work between you two. You deserve someone who will put as much effort into you as you put into them.

 

It will happen...probably when you least expect it.

[Sadman84]

Thank you guys so much

 

Whisper in the dark, thank you. I'd say this is the one time i actually enjoy playing out the life that me and my ex could have shared and seeing it go to hell in the future. Its pretty amazing. I'll try to remember this when I miss her.

 

I used to think female company was what i was lacking, but now i have plenty of female friends, i miss the cuddling, and the kissing, and all that comes with it, i need someone to love. lol, i feel so dependent!